Never, Ever. I could've been reading. I could've been taking a nap. I could've been bicycling. I could've been counting the # of tile in my bathroom. I don't get the number of positive reviews here. This movie has no redeeming qualities. Not one. I tried to look for one. I tried to justify the time I spent watching it. I couldn't. It's worse than Scary Movie 2, I didn't think that was even possible.
Reviews
10 Reviews
Battle Royale
(2000)
Another Favorable Review.
28 May 2002
I was pleasantly surprised by this. After reading a few reviews describing this as an ultra violent and gory film, I expected to probably shut the movie off 5 minutes into it. I didn't find it terribly gory, and it was violent (it is, after all, teenagers killing each other with knives, guns, bows&arrows, what have you) but it didn't seem more violent than what some adults do to each other in American movies. With 42 kids set to die, I also expected the movie to lose its way after the first few kills, but the movie did a good job with each. Paranoia, Jealousy, they all figure into how some of the students are murdered. It's not just killing for killing's sake with some of them.
The Deep End
(2001)
Nice Surprise
28 May 2002
I only rented it because there was nothing else I wanted to see at the video store. I'm glad I knew mostly nothing of this movie before I saw it. This is definitely one of those pics where the less you know, the better.It has a lot of good surprises, nothing really surprises me anymore, so that was appreciated. Kick ass performance by Tilda Swinton, and maybe I should watch ER sometime..... who knew Goran Visnjic was so delicious?!
Tokyo Raiders
(2000)
What Fun!
28 May 2002
If you're looking for a movie with an attractive cast, cool fighting, and some laughter thrown in, this is the movie for you. Solid entertainment, but you'll forget all about it a few hours later. My only qualm... the lead girl who always needed rescuing got a bit annoying at times.
The Nameless
(1999)
I'd been wanting to see this for so long.....
28 May 2002
And it did not disappoint. Nice, creepy movie that doesn't rely on much violence, only the mentioning of it. Just listening to the characters speak of the nameless' penchant for torture was enough to force me to see this with the lights on. This movie and "Thesis" whet my appetite for more Spanish horror films.
Tell Me Something
(1999)
Needs to be watched more than once.
28 May 2002
Warning: Spoilers
I didn't get some of the ending, so I'll have watch it again to pick up on some things I missed before. But that's ok by me, why would I watch this movie more than once if everything had already been explained to me?
For it's first hour, Tell Me Something is a pretty formulaic serial killer movie. Even though I'd felt like I'd seen all of this before, I was still entertained. The flick's got a lot of style. It's after the hour long mark that the pic feels like it's shaping up to set itself apart from the others. Overall I highly recommend it. One nitpick though -- MINOR SPOILER The killer would have been caught very early on if the cops *had their guns with them*. Why would any cops give up their guns and then proceed to go into strange places all by themselves to look for a dangerous,bodypart cutting psycho? Bad plot device.
For it's first hour, Tell Me Something is a pretty formulaic serial killer movie. Even though I'd felt like I'd seen all of this before, I was still entertained. The flick's got a lot of style. It's after the hour long mark that the pic feels like it's shaping up to set itself apart from the others. Overall I highly recommend it. One nitpick though -- MINOR SPOILER The killer would have been caught very early on if the cops *had their guns with them*. Why would any cops give up their guns and then proceed to go into strange places all by themselves to look for a dangerous,bodypart cutting psycho? Bad plot device.
Terror Tract
(2000)
Fun!
3 July 2001
As far as horror is concerned, this movie doesn't really have any (except for the granny mask in the last story--skeery!)But it's not boring. First story seems very familiar--did I see it on Tales from the Crypt or something? It's very predictable, but still entertaining. Second story with a bratty little girl and her father felt longer than it was but that's because of how much was packed into it.Malcolm in the Middle's Bryan Cranston made it better than what it was. Third story with the spooky Granny Killer was also predictable but it had Will Estes and Brenda Strong, so that's ok! The wraparound segments with John Ritter were hilarious.
If I Die Before I Wake
(1998)
Now this is Horror!
3 July 2001
Warning: Spoilers
Contains SPOILERS! Never before have I seen a movie where I felt involved. The lead actress gives such a good performance, that when she came out from behind the door swinging that bat, I was swinging right along with her. This movie starts it's suspense one minute into it's run time and does not let up on you for the rest of it's 73 minutes. One of the VERY few straight to video movies that deserved a theatrical run. Run to your video store to pick up this movie. NOW!!!
Return to Paradise
(1998)
Tearjerker to the Max
3 July 2001
Great performances by all involved. If I didn't care about them or sympathize with them, this film wouldn't have affected me the way it did. It's very draining, and thought provoking (what would you do?)I've never cried as much as I did during this movie. Highly Recommended.
Thesis
(1996)
So glad I rented this one!
3 July 2001
What do you want in a horror movie? Scares? This flick's got them: Imagine knowing that there's a psycho filming him/herself using a chainsaw to cut people into peices, then imagine waking up in the middle of the night to find a glowing red light from a camcorder a couple feet in front of you. Scariest scene in a horror movie I've seen in years. What else do you want in horror? Laughs? It's got them too: I was going to write one of the killers lines just as he/she's preparing to cut one of his/her victims, but you have to see it to appreciate it. If you want gore in your movie, you're not going to find much here. Much of the violence is off-camera. I prefer it that way. The real terror is in watching the expressions on the faces of those who have seen the violence.
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