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Reviews
Thanksgiving (2023)
Did Eli Roth just start the next slasher franchise
Finally finally Eli gets to make his full length Thanksgiving slasher movie and boy does it deliver
I saw a lot of people say their expectations were low or they didn't realize it would be gory
Dude this is the man who brought us Hostel and his famous nod to Cannibal Holocaust - the green inferno
Did yall really not expect to see carnage?
I adore the cast
Rick Hoffman , barbara Hershey & Patrick Dempsey
The younger cast was also spot on they did an amazing job
It was equal parts horror and comical
I throughly enjoyed it and will revisit each thanksgiving
I'm not sure if Roth will want to franchise this but with these reviews I feel like he could at the least do a sequel
Nothing like horror on the holidays
Nice work !
No Hard Feelings (2023)
Actually funny
Who would give this a one star review ?
All of the characters are amazing this cast was top notch.
I liked the music and I agree with someone posting this movie was very early 2000's vibe
The only movie I've really watched Jen in is the Hunger Games I haven't really seen A lot of her movies
I think she's freaking hilarious
I found this movie entertaining and I am the worlds worst about sitting through a movie
The Kid that plays Percy is awesome
I love Maneater I can't believe how good the music was
I like how they did a nod to Ferris Bueller with the car at the end
It was heartfelt and funny as hell I thought.
Pet Sematary: Bloodlines (2023)
I'm surprised the ratings are so bad
I didn't expect an Oscar worthy film. What were you guys expecting ? I thought it was a really decent movie for what it was. I'm always looking for something scary to watch and I've truly seen some bad ones. Ones where I wanted the 2 hours of my life back. This was not one of those for me. I liked it. I didn't love it it's going to be one I rewatch but it was fine.
If you want to talk about the Pet Sematary remake being horrible I'll absolutely agree. I couldn't even finish it.
But yeah this was a cute little addition , the timeline was a little off but who cares
Cast was good as was the acting was good.
The kid they got to play Jud was kind of a thirst trap
If you're bored and looking for something to watch I'd watch it.
Suits (2011)
Equally riveting and full of heart
What I skipped over initially has in turn become one of my all time favorites.
I heard of Suits back when it premiered but wrote it off thinking it would be too stuffy. I like drama... when it's mixed with slapstick goofiness to offset the dramatic tone and boy oh boy does this one deliver.
Between watching Harvey kick ass and Mike rain maning his way through the legal world you get the distinct pleasure of characters like Louis Litt stealing the show with his quirky off the wall persona. Donna being the ethereally gorgeous " office mom" and Harvey's right hand. You'll have a love hate relationship with Jessica because she's powerful but also strategic and cold.
Every actor on this show plays their part very very well by simultaneously complimenting one another.
No spoilers but DB Woodside at one point joins the cast and I was elated to see one of my favorite Buffy the Vampire Slayer alums.
Tune into this one you'll get sucked right in.
The Ravine (2021)
I'm only giving it a 4 because of Teri Polo
Man on man. When I clicked on this one and read the cast line up I thought to myself how did I miss this one?
Eric Dane - Peter Facinelli.
Teri Polo gave an outstanding performance in this otherwise piece of crap film.
I'll go ahead and just lay it out there so if you do want to waste 2 hours of your life on this don't keep reading
The first 20 mins of this film are somewhat promising
You think it's gonna be a who dunnit but it just turns into a what the F**
Let's go into how half the storyline was wasted on how the guys went through a botched Robbery as kids and served 3 years for it
Then they see a mysterious lady in jail that's their real life astral projection guardian Angel trying to whisper to them to do good things in life even though clearly their ears were clogged.
Peter Facinelli basically goes nuts and murders his family but it's ok because the angel lady came back and told Teri Polo that he went to heaven anyway because the family forgave him for it.
Literally POS movie. What a waste of time for this great set of actors. Don't waste your time.
Willow (2022)
I couldn't even finish it
The film Willow is one of my all time favorite movies. It's incredible for it's time especially being as debuted in the late 80's. Kilmer in his prime , starring alongside his real life love at the time. When i first caught wind of this series, excited was an understatement.
I was there the day it premiered ready. Let's do this. I've got my popcorn ready and as soon as I hit play it was like someone just sucked the oxygen out of the room.
Don't read any further if you don't want this spoiled
It starts out two teenage girls sparring that are clearly into one another. I immediately hated it.
It turns out one of them is the daughter of Martian and Sorcha. The princess turns out to be another random 15 year old.
I don't know how they did the math on that one this movie is as old as I am and I'm well into my thirties.
Joanne Whaley is back and I'm glad to see her but for the 3 episodes I watched she was barely even on screen
How are you going to bring back her and Warwick Davis and have them become actual supporting characters
The name of the series is WILLOW.
I want to see a story about WILLOW
Not a teenage long story
I may give it another go but it's very doubtful I'll get the urge to watch any more of it.
House of Darkness (2022)
Pretty much a letdown
Wow this is a prime example of how someone can take incredible actors and give them no material to work with thus a sucky movie is made!
Let me preface by saying , I'd watch anything with Justin Long. I have had a crush on JL since I watched the first OG Jeepers Creepers film on a date back in like 02.'
So I finished it but that's only because I'd listen to Justin Long in a one hour infomercial about athletes foot. Do you also have a crush on JL? Because I'm going to tell you right now if you don't you're probably not going to make it through this film.
I don't know how these incredible people were given such garbage to work with. This could have been a really good movie. There's just sooo much bland drawn out dialogue and ..squinting because you can't see a dang thing ... I mean were the female actresses afraid of seeing a fine line? Or? Because Kate you still look amazing
You and Justin are amazing together. I'm glad you had a great time making this film but I don't think a lot of people had a great time watching it
Let's do this again but funny and with a plot. I'll be ready.
After Midnight (2019)
I liked it
The bad reviews make me laugh. I get it because I definitely go against the grain of what's liked and disliked in the film world. There are perfectly good examples of movies with good ratings I definitely could not finish. But to each their own. It's probably obvious but Jeremy Gardner both directed and played the main character in this film. Which, fair , sometimes if you want something done a specific way you might as well do it yourself.
Someone made a comment that it looked like it was filmed on an iPhone camera. I'll have to disagree on that one. I've had a limited experience with film equipment but just enough to let you know that if something was filmed on a cellphone device , you'd know
What I look for when picking a movie is whether or not it shows any originality and to me this did. I watched the trailer beforehand and it seemed intriguing enough.
This wasn't the best movie I've seen but nowhere near the worst. I don't want those minutes of my life back that I spent so in my opinion its a 7 or in the very least a 6.5
I think it's just the story of two guys who got drunk one night and said let's make a monster flick and that's what they did. Kudos.
Extra points for that Lisa Loeb song at the end. 90's teens only will appreciate what you did there.
Violent Night (2022)
F**g awesome
Die hard meets the female Kevin McAlister meets bad Santa. That's how I would best describe it...
It's a dang good ride. David Harbour plays a convincing Santa. John Leguizamo has still got it! I was glad to see Beverly DAngelo as the tough matriarch. She did an fantastic job as well. The star of the show is little Trudy , the granddaughter of Beverly's ( Gertrude's character.)
This film lived up to exactly what you think it would be and the action never slowed, lagged , or disappointed.
I took my teenage son and he really enjoyed it as well Excellent excellent movie. This will be added to my Christmas collection.
I hope you see it , enjoy!
Top Gun: Maverick (2022)
EPIC
I have low expectations for sequels especially ones that come out 30+ years later. I was born in the 80's, the OG Gun movie was a favorite.
Sequels tend to be a letdown but this film restored faith in any doubt that it can be done.
They just blew it out of the water.
Do yourself a favor , go to the theater and see it for yourself.
I don't even have anything I would say could have been different. It was perfect.
I'm pretty sure Tom Cruise helped make sure of that. Great job.
Fresh (2022)
This Movie
Is freaking fantastic. I haven't been this excited about a movie in a very long time. You should definitely watch it. I honestly feel like I wanted to give it a 8.5 but that wasn't an option.
Deep Water (2022)
I will simplify this for you
Here it goes
..
...
......
...........
A man washes dishes while watching his wife cheat in their own home then later murders all over her lovers.
Also there are some snails. And some pool parties with homemade cookies.
Yup , that's pretty much it.
The Lost Daughter (2021)
No please
Maybe I'm just too harsh but this movie was nothing like I expected or was hoping it to be. If you're like me I am into weird psychological thrillers or the main Character is crazy and doesn't know it. Also with a title like the lost daughter I took that as a literal term. That little girl did go missing for 5 mins but the only thing that was lost was the plot.
The whole film centers around the main Character and Dakota Johnson's character two of the most self centered lazy people imaginable ( the characters NOT the actors )
Neither one of them wanted to accept responsibility for themselves , were and I can't emphasis this enough horrible parents.
The main characters obsessions With Dakotas character was beyond sick also she called her out for all of the things she did at her age which is extremely hypocritical
Towards the end Dakotas character stabs her and she dramatically goes and falls into the beach which is ironic since at this point I also wanted to drown myself.
Then she just sits up and calls her two kids like nothing happened. Dumbest movie ever.
Ghostbusters: Afterlife (2021)
Oh the nostalgia
I genuinely enjoyed watching this film. I took my son and nephew they're 11 & 13. I was born in 1984 the year the first Ghostbusters premiered. I grew up with these movies. I'm sure critics will try and break down the plot and say what they would've done differently. For me personally I'm just elated this film exists
and major spoiler
The original cast comes back and pays Homage to Ramis in a very touching and unique way.
I loved it.
After We Collided (2020)
Literal smut
If you enjoyed 50 shades of Grey and I mean you watched it and thought it was a fantastic well put together Cinematic experience then you're in luck. Otherwise you can skip it. The film centers around 2 characters Tess and Hardin. Or as I like to refer to him Hardon. I'll go ahead and include the first film review. Here's the run down. It's basically set up like 50 shades with a shes all that ending. She falls for bad boy but it ended up being a dare to date her. But they fall in " love". If you consider love to be 2 people copulating 80% of the time. It's not romantic , it's not inspiring , it's just two horny college kids getting drunk and having a good time. No one knows what they want it's just jumbled. The actors weren't bad just the movie itself bombed. It's a no for me.
Endless Love (1981)
What did I just watch ?
So I remember this movie from when I was a little girl I tried to get my mom to let me watch it. She said absolutely not because clearly contains a lot of sexual scenes. I just watched it for the first time tonight on Netflix. I am a 36-year-old woman so I figure that I can handle it at this point. First of all James Spader was so incredibly good looking in his day does anyone have a Time Machine that I can borrow? OK no sorry back to the movie. If you like movies that are made by lifetime about gaslighting you might actually enjoy this movie, but I did not. How can you have such an amazing cast and have this movie make absolutely literally no sense? The plot was all over the place it was like the writers dropped the script in floor out of order, pick it up and say we'll just go with it this way yeah this will work.
In the first 15-20 minutes of the movie you were thinking hey this is going to be a love story about two kids that just can't stop smashing or whatever you guys call it nowadays.
But poor little Jade just can't get any sleep at night because her new boyfriend is keeping her up all hours of the night to play hide the winkie. So Dad says absolutely not going to happen she's not getting her schoolwork done go away for a month. David, the boyfriend, decides he cannot stay away so what does he do to get her attention he holds a boom box over his head playing her favorite song and she runs to him and they live happily ever after. No just kidding he burns her freaking house down. An idea he got from Tom Cruise who is in this movie about three seconds.
His reasoning for this is well maybe if I set the house on fire I can save her like a hero and everyone will forgive me. Except that doesn't happen he pleads guilty to arson , goes to a loony bin. ... This sound more and more like a lifetime movie?
He somehow convince his parents that he is of sound mind and comes home to Chicago. His father however, reveals to him that Jade and her family no longer live there and presents him the 4000 letters that he wrote to Jade that were never mailed
This infuriates David and he is thinking that Jade hates him so he has to go find her.
He ends up in New York City where he meets up with Jade's mom who admits that she watched him having panky with her daughter and it turned her on so she then intern had panky with her husband and pretended it was him.
Then she proceeds to try to hook up with the guy who set her house on fire and deflowered her own child. I'm not making any of this up as ridiculous as it sounds. David looks up Jades address however in the mist of all this he sees jades father in downtown New York with his new fiancé does some weird salute/eye voodoo with Hugh - the dad-
Freaks the dad out so he tries to run over to him I'm assuming to beat him up
Then he gets hit by a car and dies. So David once again goes back to Jade's moms house with all of Jades family like he is betrothed to her and nowadays tries to comfort the mom that tried to sleep with him the night before. James Spader the brother tries to knock him old cold because he's the clearly the only one with any sense in this entire film. Beside the Dad who's now deceased.
In the meantime Jade goes to see David and tells him to get over her
But his little puppy eyes just throw her for a loop and he convinces her to go back to Chicago with her. Even after James Spader the brother in the film tells her that he ruined their life and caused her own father's death she still at the end goes after David. So yeah this movie is terrible it had the potential to not be terrible but it is indeed terrible. Don't waste two hours of your life.
He's All That (2021)
There are reasons you might like this film
Legitimate reasons.
1. You're a 12 year old girl
2. You identify as a preteen.
3. You're a mom to young girls and it brings you joy to see them smile and sit in the room together.
Other than this the film could not exist and It would be just fine. Literally they could pull it and act like it never happened and the world would still turn just fine. I hope the cast all developed long term friendships from their time working on this project and I would consider that the only positive thing to come out of the overall experience of having to watch this.
The Private Life of a Modern Woman (2017)
What was this ??
I'm only rating this film at a 3 because of how great of an actress Sienna Miller is. Otherwise , well let's just say if a rating scale were to go in the negative this film would definitely be in the minis category.
I'm not going to give any spoilers just in case somebody wanted to watch this cinematic abortion crap that somebody wrote off as a "creative film".
I should've known at the beginning when they started with that opera music and horrible artwork that it was going to be a dud but I said what the heck I can't sleep let's see what happens. Like I said, sienna Miller is actually a very very good actress but the plot was just all over the place. Or should I say lack therof.
It all starts off with her ex-boyfriend, then introduces her current boyfriend, what I assume to be her friend/therapist , her mom & grandfather, a detective , and lastly a strange older man who was so irrelevant to the already pointless film it made even more sense.
All of it was was a bunch of talking sessions with Sienna's character. You keep waiting and waiting for it to move on from that , or get to some point or resolution which never comes. Then it's just over and you're sitting there feeling like you wasted an hour and a half of your life. Because you did.
Sorry to be so harsh but I just feel like this film could have Been so much better but it was just a huge disappointment.
The Affair (2014)
Noah & Allison but this is no notebook romance
I'm really thankful for IMDB user suggestions because this one random night watch has become one of my all time favorites series. The premise of the show is an affair between two of the main characters but over the course of the series it becomes so much deeper than that. It really shows how one decision can cause a ripple of effects and throw everyone involved into a tail spin. It's told from multiple perspectives. I have a love hate for the main character of Noah but I think but the end of the series I was able to finally get him. The whole cast is absolutely phenomenal.
The writing is brilliant.
I cried at the end.
I don't want to give anything away , you'll just have to try it out and see if it's for you.
The Good Guy (2009)
A fairly enjoyable movie
Great cast. Andrew McCarthy is an amazingly convincing asshole boss. The main character and voice of the movie Tommy takes Daniel , a very shy non aggressive rookie under his wing, in the game of Wall Street trade.
There's also Alexis Bledels character Tommy girlfriend who is weighing her relationship with Tommy under the added pressures of a possible work relocation
She and Daniel inevitably fall for one another shortly after their meet cute at a book store. You know cause they are both readers
I didn't like how the end outed Tommy as they protagonist that ending would've been the same had he been faithful or otherwise
I don't regret watching this film. I'd recommend it to your chick flick Queue for a rainy Saturday
A Ghost Story (2017)
Excellent actors, terrible movie
I'm a huge fan of Rooney Mara shes had some great films. Casey Affleck is equally as great and is the best looking of the Affleck brothers IMO.
I shouldn't technically be reviewing this film since I neglected to finish it. The 38 minutes I did watch were complete and utter crap. If you're going to have a slow burn make it good. Creepy ass score. Hidden clues. Faces in the walls. Something. Instead it was just bleh.
A ghost in a cut out sheet watching Rooney Mara eat an pie for 10 minutes In dead silence.
I'm sorry what was that?
I change my rating to 3/10 stars because Casey Affleck is still a joy to look at , at the Least.