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Reviews
Glitter (2001)
Not as bad as it appears!
Well, critically panned it was, but in comparison to "Freddy Got Fingered", this film is more akin to "The Godfather"!
Yes, Carey is dreadfully wooden. And yes, the acting is grade Z. As is the production, the script and pretty much everyone attached to this film, but Mariah's music just about makes the movie tolerable - and emphasise the word "tolerable" there!
Unless someone is paying you to see this, or you absolutely love Mariah Carey, avoid this waste of space of a movie. It's the cinematic equivalent to boil-in-the-bag rice: easy to handle, but bland and unappetising!
La sindrome di Stendhal (1996)
A movie you can take your eyes off of!
Argento's films are ones you'll either love or loathe! However, after watching this, I was bitterly disappointed. The film dispatches the murderer just over an hour into the film, and then the second hour seems rather pointless. And when all is said and done, you don't really care about the last two hours you've just spent watching this film!
I love Argento's works: Tenebrae, Opera, Inferno, Suspiria, Deep Red - all are excellent films, and ones I'd recommend to others without a doubt. But this one is a real let down!
The film's opening is superb. The idea that art could "harm" its viewer, is an intriguing way of Argento dealing with filmic violence. Yet, some of the CGI work is pretty mediocre, and doesn't gel with the regular SFX work. Asia Argento is a talented actress, but the dubbing robs the viewer of much of the enjoyment of the film. It really is an atrocious dub, that has been released to many parts of Europe - potentially one of the worst Argento dubs ever! Let's pray that a subtitled version gets released soon!
As such, with so many faults, I can't really recommend this movie. The film's too long for what it is saying. The dubbing is appalling. The film quickly loses the viewer's interest, and the ending is a gigantic cop-out.
And with TV shows like "CSI: Crime Scene Investigations" utilising similar CGI effects to this film, but making the film's FX look less than great, is not going to help endear it anymore. A real disappointment, even for an Argento fan like myself!
Series 7: The Contenders (2001)
Its strange, but it works!
Having received a free ticket to see a preview of this movie, I had my interest peak, when I discovered the subject matter: reality TV shows. With all the current furore over shows like "Big Brother 2" and "Survivor", et al, it was interesting to see a film tackle the topic of just how far is too far to push the reality-show genre.
Simply put, you'll either love or hate this film. Those who hate it, will probably be offended by the whole idea of the films premise: people killing people, for a game! Those who aren't, will either love violent comedies like those of Tarantino, or will get the hidden message buried deep in the film.
For me, personally, I got the message. Sometimes TV can go too far! Just as with the "camcorder" sequence in "Henry: Portrait Of A Serial Killer", the director is asking us a serious and thought-provoking question: "You've paid your $10 to see a violent movie, and to be entertained, and yet you condemn on-screen violence. So who's right and who's wrong?!"
Whilst the outcome of the film isn't quite what you had expected, it is certainly a film you go see for an "experience". Experience this controversial movie, and think about what I and the movie have spoken to you about. It's a strange movie, but it does work!
The Trigger Effect (1996)
If only...
I rented this film, from my local video store, after browsing some of the older tapes on their shelves. What I found was an intriguing movie, that gives a great concept, only to balls-it-up totally, with a quickie ending.
The idea of "What would you do, if it came down to saving yourself and your loved ones, in a crisis?" is certainly a timely question, especially in this day and age. And, with a strong character actor cast, including Richard T Jones, (from TV cop-series Brooklyn South); Michael Rooker (from Henry: Portrait Of A Serial Killer and JFK), and Bill Smitrovich (from most of Michael Mann's films), it certainly makes for an entertaining, and diverting, 90 minutes.
Alas, David Koepp leaves us with this rushed ending of happily-ever-after, that ruins all that has come before. A shame, because this movie has so much that makes you think and question what you might do yourself, if placed in this situation. Some of the scenes are eerily tense and unnerving, especially when Kyle MacLachlan's character suddenly snaps halfway through, and realises that he is no less an animal than the rest of us.
Whether Koepp's ending was forced upon him from external forces, I can't say, though it wouldn't surprise me if it were, because it's only the final few moments that are capped-on artificially. The previous 85 minutes all unreel at a nice pace, that just keeps you guessing as to what is going to happen.
Despite my negative review, I'd still recommend this film, and would love to view the BBC series "Connections" from the 1980's that this film is allegedly based upon. Sadly, even the BBC in London, don't have any record of this series existing. Maybe this is Koepp's way of sticking two fingers up at the (alleged) studio-imposed ending?
Chicken Run (2000)
Superb animation classic!
"Chicken Run" is one of those films that adults don't want to admit they enjoyed, because it's animated, and is mainly aimed at kids. In the wake of the three "Wallace & Gromit" shorts, NIck Park has created a painstaking recreation of life on a farm in 1940's England. Mixing slapstick humour, off-the-cuff "adult content", (that 99% of kids won't understand, but will wet the pants of every viewer over 18), and the documentary realism of his earlier work "Creature Comforts", this movie is simply stunning! Quirky, sharp, and even poignant, it simply begs to be watched time and time again. Ideal for young and old alike, but with a definite plus factor, for those at the senior end of the age range! Be warned however, that some relatively coarse language has been let through, and may not be entirely appropriate for the younger members of your family! Oh, and keep an eye right through the end credits, or you'll miss a fabulously sly joke! A guaranteed cracker!
The Last House on the Left (1972)
Possibly the most pointless "Nasty" ever made!
Having heard all about this classic "Video Nasty", I got hold of it on DVD. Yet, after the 81 minute run time, I was left with only one question: "Why?". Why was this labelled a "Nasty", when so little is shown, even in comparison to some modern-day horror films? Why does everyone else call it a genre classic, when it is so ineptly acted, with such a dire script and such lame effects? Well, I guess only Wes Craven and Sean Cunningham can answer those. What this movie is, is pointless, crass and simply downright pathetic. The gore is limited, and what little you can see through the "raw" photography, is obviously fake. David Hess looks less like a psychopath, and more like a slightly-mad drugged-up hippie! And the finale, is simply lame! Forget this dire movie, and let it be consigned to history forever. I can't even say that this movie has the exploitation factor, going in its favour, as there is simply nothing exceptionally exploitive that is shown, that hasn't appeared so many times before in other "Nasties"! For those of you who want to see something at least remotely plausable, and even genuinely unsettling, go for Meir Zarchi's much-reviled "I Spit On Your Grave". At least that film has the redeeming factor of being worth discussing for its pro-woman or anti-woman viewpoint! If "Last House" is so great, then why has even its director essentially disowned the movie?! A total, and unmitigating, mess!