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The Watch (I) (2012)
1/10
Awful, Really, Really Awful
29 August 2013
And I've enjoyed my share of scat jokes and comedies. And they can be funny, if executed probably. But there was nothing to this lame excuse of a movie except for scat jokes, and masturbation jokes, and penis jokes.

The premise of the movie was good. The execution is bad beyond belief. I sat down with my son to watch this, and was uncomfortable throughout the movie so we stopped watching halfway. Just to see how bad it is, i went back later to watch the end. Just as bad as the beginning.

Each of the "stars" of the movie is bad enough on his own. Put them together - the prefect (shit) storm. The question that comes to mind, is why would people allow themselves to be filmed that way. Are these guys so poor that they have to take on any job like a crack addict doing bizarre porn?

I watched it 'on demand'. It was free. I still want my money back!

Seriously people, do not watch this.
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2/10
Take a great short story and turn it into brain mush
16 August 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Sigh, they took a great subtle story and turned it into a load of turd. Makes no sense... No sense at all.

Time waves? Either you have changed history or you haven't...

Multiple hunter teams sent to the same point in time and none ever meet?

After the 'Final' time wave all the human structures and technologies stay intact?

Arrrrrrrrrrgh...

The only reason I gave it a 2 instead of a 1 is the fact that the reevolution of the human chick was SOOOOOOOO cute...

Otherwise, shame on you guys, you really screwed up...
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Ring Around the Rosie (2006 Video)
1/10
Rent it if you're desperate, watch it if that feeling gets worse
14 August 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Sob,

why, why, why did I rent this?

Cut to the chase: Do not, under no circumstances watch this film.

Where, where, where is the plot? Remember that thing called a plot? And it took FIVE writers to produce this drivel?

And the amount of stupid, stupid stuff!

1. The cisco IP phone that she's using at the office is not connected... The phone's screen is BLANK.

2. When she gets to the house she find three rats in the breadbox. HOW did three rats find their way into a CLOSED bread box?

3. She starts removing covers from furniture in a house that has not been used in years - not a single speck of dust.

4. When you cut the head of a chicken, there's a TON of blood...

5. Constant makeup on the protagonist. Like, everyone goes to bed with lip gloss...

...

OK, the WORSE movie ever - or a good challenger to the throne
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