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Reviews
Autumn in New York (2000)
A bad movie is the only beautiful thing that truly nourishes.
THE non-stop laugh-out-loud smash comedy of the summer. MGM really botched the advertising campaign on this one. I didn't realize that a screenwriter with the delightfully demented sense of humor of the creators of "Airplane" was making a spoof of romantic weepers. The lines were truly inspired comic gags. A small sampling: "Food is the only beautiful thing that truly nourishes." "I can smell the rain. When did I learn to do that?" "What About Love?!?" "You are my family!! you are my family (incoherent sobbing)" "What do we do, Will, with this moment that we're in?" Again, I state that this is just a small sampling of the plethora of howlers that exist in this film. Add to this the nonsensical secondary characters, the beautiful cinematography and two romantic leads that have all of the sexual chemistry of a drawer full of office supplies and you have the greatest gift to aficionados of bad movies everywhere. Believe me, a screenwriter has to work very hard to make Winona Ryder look bad. I do believe that she is one of the greatest actresses of her generation, however her abilities are not shown here. Aside from looking great she is given little to do, but deliver unintentionally hilarious lines with as much sincerity as she can muster. Truly a must-see in the pantheons of cinematic mis-steps.
Supernova (2000)
You know you're in trouble when....
As a moviegoer, you know you're in trouble when...
-you can't even say "Well, at least the special effects were great."
-the only character not severely stunted emotionally is the villain.
-the only good things you can say include "James Spader sure has buffed-up."
-the movie is so embarressed about itself that it doesn't even tell you it's title until the end of the movie.
-Angela Bassett's discomfort at being in the movie is more palpable than her character's discomfort at the prospect of death.
Not that I want to give the impression that this is the worst movie ever made. It just isn't good. Angela Bassett and Wilson Cruz are fairly well spared from embarrassment because they transcend the material, but this really isn't the movie Lou Diamond Phillips should have followed up "Bats" with. The acting, overall, was fine. However, the story was alternately boring and lame. I was especially amused by the implication at the beginning that violent 20th century cartoons (specifically "Tom and Jerry") led to the entire human race becoming malicious. Nice.
In the past, I have found some movies with really bad word-of-mouth to be quite enjoyable. This isn't one of them.
Armageddon (1998)
As if specifically written for Mystery Science Theater 3000.
When I go to the theater so see a movie, I am usually the epitome of theater etiquette. I am quiet and thoughtful and considerate of the people around me. This is consistantly true, with one exception...when I saw "Armageddon". It was as if the producers and writers got together and said, "hey, let's help out the people at Mystery Science Theater 3000 by making a big-budget version of the type of swill they usually watch." As I watched this movie in the theater, the smart-aleck comments rose from my vocal chords with such ease. It was filled with such an unabashed ineptitude that I felt that I had to respond vocally. Why was the movie so bad? Oh, where to begin! With so many elements to consider...the infamous "animal cracker love scene"...the meteor growling, not expelling gas or exploding, but growling(!!!)as it passes the camera...the entire "end of the world as light-hearted comedy" mentality of the production...I just am inundated with compelling arguments for this to be considered one of the worst films of all time. However, in defense of the movie, I've never enjoyed such a horrible movie this much. The rhythm of the scenes is perfect for outside comments. In fact, I bought the movie specifically for the purpose of having parties to make fun of it. When this element is added, the movie becomes quite delightful. It's a shame that Mystery Science Theater 3000 is no more. What fun they could have had with this bomb.
Superstar (1999)
A highlight among recent SNL sketches turned movies.
This film is going to inevitably be compared to all of the other "Saturday Night Live" inspired films that have been made, so to get that comparison out of the way, it ranks near the top of those. In fact, only "Wayne's World" presented as multi-faceted a character as Mary Catherine Gallagher. However, this is a pretty entertaining movie when not compared to the other SNL films also. While watching the film, the entire audience was swept up in Molly Shannon's exhuberance. Whether or not you like the character, you have to acknowledge Ms. Shannon's enthusiasm and in this film her enthusiasm is infectious. Admittedly, some gags worked better than others (Mary Catherine's armpit smelling isn't nearly as funny as her obsession with 1970's made-for-T.V. movies), but on the whole it was light, funny and, at times, surprisingly poignant. I would be interested to see Ms. Shannon, who has shown her aptitude for physical comedy, in a more serious role. That would be a step in the right direction if she really wants to be a superstar.
Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999)
This is an incredibly underrated movie.
Is it possible for a film that has made over $400 million at the box office to also be one of the most underrated films of all time? I think so. Like many people, I was not sure what to think after I watched TPM for the first time. There had been so much media speculation about it before it's release that any movie, any story, any performances would almost seem a disappointment. I have, however, since seen it again and without the anticipation factor, I was able to see the movie for what it was, an excellent opening act for a continued story. Within the frame of the film, there was a plethora of brilliant images and beautiful symbolisms. There is a lot more going on in the mind of George Lucas than dollar signs. The power of the music is also unquestionable. John Williams has created a score that not only underscores the emotions of the film, but it also stands as a very strong piece of music on it's own. And finally, I have to say it...I didn't find Jar Jar annoying. I know that saying this will render me on the unpopular side of the issue, but he was the film's comic relief and in that capacity, he served very well.
The Hunchback of Notre Dame (1996)
The most powerful animated film of all time.
This is the most powerful animated film ever made. While I realize that this is a highly subjective comment, I feel that the movie justifies it. Within the first five minutes, as the story is being set up, there is more genuine emotional connection than most movies have in their entirety. At the heart of "Hunchback"'s success is an incredible marriage of the music and the visual element. As Frollo chases the young gypsy woman at the beginning, the visual and emotional content is already very powerful. However, when the viewer realizes that the choir is singing the "Dies Irae" text in the background, it gives the scene a more frightening edge of foreshadowing. With outstanding animation, wonderful vocal performances and a faithfulness to the adult nature of the story, this movie is a cut above the rest of Disney's excellent animated product. While "Beauty and the Beast" was a very good film, this is the cartoon that deserved an Oscar nomination for Best Picture.