Reviews

Some movies are bad. No big deal, I lose a couple bucks. Still some redeeming qualities. Some movies are so bad, they're good (note: ANY Ed Wood movie) yet again, not an entire waste of time. Then there is this movie. I see movies a lot. I have my own rating scaling it goes from 1 to 10. I saw Species 2 and had to devise a new system. This is movie is so bad I give it a C on a scale of 1-10. This movie is so bad it bends the space-time continuum (watching the movie is like an eternity).

When I walked into this movie I thought of hell as a place of eternally burning hellfire, now I think hell is a Movie theatre where this is the only movie showing.

Why is it bad?: I'm sorry, but a thousand words just isn't enough space to truly express the horridness of this movie.

After seeing this movie I contemplated not having children so I would not bring anything into a world where this, this thing can be passed off as a movie.

Frankly I would rather shovel manure for the rest of my life than see this movie again. You think I'm joking, don't you? I kid you not my friends. If you've seen this movie, you understand what I'm saying.

If you haven't seen this movie, I envy you, because the day I die I will be thinking about the two hours of my life I wasted watching this movie when I could have been banging my head against a wall or watching grass grow.

But honestly folks; I would rather have naked photos of Bea Arthur tatooed on my inner eyelids so that I see her when I sleep than see this movie again.

This is what I call a "movie for the deaf" the greatest special effects I have seen (and I have seen many a movie), but then you have to listen to the dialogue. Worst of all is Jar Jar. I can barely stand to write his name because it brings on flashbacks worse than Vietnam. When I saw the movie the first time I said wow at the special effects and wow at the horridness of Jar Jar. I sat on the edge of my seat just hoping he would die painfully by the end of the movie. And then I saw it again(For the special effects)and even though I knew the outcome I still sat on the edge of my seat hoping that Jar Jar's grizzly demise would come soon. On a final note If you are a diehard Star Wars fan you will like this movie no matter what I say and even if you're not a Star Wars fan it will still be a fun, enjoyable (with the exception of Jar Jar)experience. BOTTOM LINE: See the movie, bring some ear plugs.