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Don-158
Reviews
Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999)
Where were you when the Force died?
I remember a day when Jedis, dark and light, didn't have to use microscopes to determine who was strong with the Force and those who weren't.
In one fell swoop, Lucas's Episode One has extracted the great mystical aspects of The Force from the Star Wars Universe by introducing the concept of "mitocloridians" (sp?) When young Anakin's mitocloridian count is found to be off the charts, Liam Neeson's character tells us that mitocloridians are living organisms that live inside of the cells of every living thing. But what happened to the Force being an energy field that surrounds us and binds us? And didn't Yoda once say "Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter?" If indeed it's microbes that comprise the Force, then how did those microbes guide Luke's proton torpedos into the exhaust port? How did those microbes enable Luke to move non-living rocks? Is there a Dark Side of the microbes? The Force was once intangible, mystical, all-unifying. It was whatever you brought into the theater with you. That was a good part of why Star Wars had so much mythical appeal. It was universal. Timeless. And now The Force has a scientific explanation.
Special Edition pulled Han Solo's teeth when Greedo shot first, and neutered Luke by making him scream (instead of being decidedly silent in the original release) when he lept into the Cloud City chasm to avoid Vader. But Lucas has taken his departure from storytelling one step further. By making it definable by science, he's killed The Force. He's disemboweled the very fabric that wonderful make-believe universe is made of.
You're right. It was "just a movie," but aside from merely entertaining me, the trilogy of "movies" that came before it inspired me to become a writer and a filmmaker. They were my barometer and my foundation; my constant reminder that wonderful, epic stories can be told well if their heroes were believable and real. The Phantom Menace no heroes that came close to those from previous three installments.
When a movie series touches the lives of so many people on so large a scale, it becomes a legend...a myth. The movies might belong to the moviemaker, but the myth belongs to the people.
Therefore I am disenfranchised from the Star Wars myth, from here and ever after. The only thing I'm taking some sort of perverse delight in is the fact that the unstoppable genius of Lucas has come to its zenith. And as a filmmaker, knowing I could've written a better Phantom Menace while strapped to a moving dump truck makes me very, very excited.
May the Microbes Be With You,
Brian O'Malley
Bleak Future (1997)
I saw this film 6 days ago and I still can't stop laughing...
If you thought Time Bandits was great you'll love this....it has a great cast and some hilarious characters despite some techinical flaws (it was shot on super-8!) But all it's a great movie and deserves a looksee on video night... Long live Slang-man!