Reviews

Kelly is a door-to-door champaign salesperson/hooker who discovers Blipville. Traveling light, she steps off the bus with a suitcase, then asks the nice elderly bus man to haul her steamer trunk off the bus as well.

This is a bustling town. Over a stretch of three blocks, we see three cars, none parked, and the bus. Four pedestrians are walking around. Griff the cop likes to hang out at the bus station to meet new arrivals. Suspecting Kelly of having too big a rack for this town, he follows her, offering to buy a bottle of her champaign. That night, they drink the bottle and not much else happens. Griff tells her that the town is too clean for her, but she can stay at his place for the night.

Of course the town is clean. There's no people. Because a town with no people doesn't need a hooker, Griff tells her that she should move across the river because there is a great bordello over there, and the owner will buy lots of champaign. We discover that the madam has also hired a door-to-door Bon-Bon salesperson.

The other town has just three buildings, the cat house, a hospital that specializes in treating handicapped kids, and a nice little house belonging to the town spinster.

That's all anyone needs to know about this flick before walking into it. In fact, the whole things looks like you could walk right into it. Like Pleasantville only weirder.

The unintentional laughs in Naked Kiss are almost too many to count. I really wish I could have seen this movie in the theater so my inserted dialog could have joined in with everyone else's. I'll bet audiences had a lot of fun with this one. Naked Kiss is Mystery Science Theater 3000 material, only those guys are usually too safe, so they'd miss all the good lines.

Oh -- spoiler ahead!

My favorite part of Naked Kiss was in the first scene. Kelly is beating up a customer with her shoe, when out of nowhere, some guy wearing sunglasses comes up from the floor and grabs her wig, pulling it off her head. The guy, obviously a crew member wore sun glasses so as to be inconspicuous. I guess that's why he wore a white shirt too.

Naked Kiss is a great movie. I can hardly wait to see Shock Corridor.

** Potential spoiler ahead**

This movie had such promise, a great story, two of the best actors working today, innovative camera work, then -- what happened?

They say the wheels of justice move slowly, but Under Suspicion was like staring at one building from the window of a revolving restaurant!

And that ending? All the elements of a good whodunnit were there. It was, as they say, "Will keep you guessing right to the end." The problem is, you would never have guessed right. And that's no fun.

SPOILER WARNING AHEAD! GO BACK! SKIP TO THE NEXT COMMENT!

With all the glowing comments about this film and its visual and musical beauty, it stands out that no one sees anything wrong with the Samuel L. Jackson character stealing the violin. The message is that it's OK to take what you want as long as you *really* want it.

And while you're at it, call home and make it clear that your little girl will get a nice piece of stolen property as a gift.

The fact that the "expert" is a black man only confirms another stereotype.

Too bad Jackson's character couldn't have reaffirmed his sense of honor by admiring the instrument, and while lamenting the fact that someone else was going to get it, at least being satisfied that he had become a part of the violin's story.

I was as hypnotized by this movie as everyone else -- until the end. I was going to purchase the soundtrack, now I won't bother.

I guess considering the times we live in and how values and decency have gone down the tubes in favor of selfishness and greed, I shouldn't be surprized that nobody seemed to notice this. Show's to go ya, I guess.