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Reviews
Johnny Guitar (1954)
Fascinating--but NOT a western
I hate westerns--but I love this movie. Despite the title and the setting it isn't really a Western at all. It's a lot of different things--a comedy, a drama, a love story, etc. etc. There's a few gunfights, one fistfight and a lynching but they're presented in a very matter of fact manner. Basically the simple plot is full of symbolism (in dialogue and direction) and sex...lots of it. The script is incredible...every single line has a double or sexual meaning (or both!). The color is beautiful, the scenery breathtaking and all the acting is good (although Crawford overdoes it at times). There's also a lesbian subtext in the battle between Mercedes McCambridge and Crawford. Every time they're on screen, you feel the sexual tension and some of the lines are very suggestive. Heck, when Crawford first appears she's all dressed very butch in a cowboy's outfit! A one of a type film. Not too surprisingly it bombed when released...only now is it starting to get the recognition it deservers. Well worth seeing.
Better Than Chocolate (1999)
OK lesbian love story
Pretty god story about a young lesbian, who has to contend with her mother and brother (both who think she's straight), moving in with her while she falls in love. Not as funny as it sounds. It's got moments, and it's well done but some scenes fall flat, some characters who are interesting but very underdeveloped (her brother in particular), bad dialogue and some VERY poor acting (the lead actress is weak but her mother is HORRIBLY played). Also there's a ludicrous wrap up in which everything ends happily...it doesn't matter that it's totally at odds with everything that happended before it. Still, it's watchable. It shows promise.
Stop Making Sense (1984)
You don't have to like Talking Heads to like this!
First off, I never liked the group Talking Heads. I found the music unbearable. However, this film is unbelievable. I STILL don't like them, but the way this was filmed (starting off with Bryne(?) alone on stage and then adding band members one by one) was just so great and seeing them perform the songs was stunning. So I like the film CINEMATICALLY--aurally I tolerated it. One of the best concert film ever--this should be used as a guide. Try seeing it in a theatre in stereo--that's the only way to enjoy it.
The Apartment (1960)
Fantastic film
OK let me get the negative stuff aside--the plot (now) is old hat, some of the characters are TOO unpleasant, the film is about 20 minutes too long and the ending can be seen coming from a mile away. STILL, this movie is fantastic. The dialogue is crisp (no surprise in a Billy Wilder film), the acting is superb (Lemmon, MacLaine and even MacMurray who plays a bad guy!), and the photography is breathtaking. See this letterboxed! Full screen TV doesn't do it justice. No masterpiece but entertaining, engrossing and seeing Lemmon and MacLaine so young and so full of life is energizing in itself! Don't miss this one!
Stir of Echoes (1999)
Annoying "horror" film
This film starts out OK but quickly falls to pieces. There's a little boy who talks to dead people (sound familiar?) and one of his "friends" has disappeared and since he is talking to her she's (allegedly) dead. His father (Bacon) is hypnotized at a party and starts seeing her too. Then the movie, which was quite interesting, turns into a very ordinary univolving who done it. The supernatural angle seems to have been tacked on because of the success of "The Sixth Sense". The acting is good (especially Bacon), but the artsy camerawork is continuously calling attention to itself and the movie is just slow and dull. Also there are tons if unexplained questions at the end. Slow, dull and a complete waste of time.
Stigmata (1999)
Pretty good religious horror movie
The Catholic church is up in arms over this one (surprise surprise), but they're overreacting (nothing new there). This is a movie about the spirit of an old priest who dies before his work is finished. His spirit possesses the body of a young girl to carry out his work. Unfortunately, he had stigmata himself (the wounds Christ got when nailed to the cross), and she has them inflicted on her). Also the Catholic church gets wind of this and a kind priest sets out to help her, but finds there's a lot more than meets the eye. The film is unpleasant (when we see her getting the stigmata(s)), and the rock music at the beginning is WAY TOO LOUD! But the acting is excellent, the story is involving, the visual style is appropriate (everything looks dark and sinister), and the movie is intelligent. This isn't your average teen horror film--this is aimed at adults. So if you don't like blood...stay away; but if you like a good, scary adult horror film, see it!
Land of the Pharaohs (1955)
A laugh a minute
Stupid, horribly acted film about how the pyramids were built. The film LOOKS good, but the actors talk like they were from the 1950s and nothing really happens! The actors are all second rate unknowns (and they're all really bad), but Joan Collins tops them. She's easily the worst, but she does look great in her outfits and her acting is so bad it's funny! Somehow this has a cult following (totally escapes me why) and I've heard the director Hawks hated this film. Boring, pointless...not worth seeing.
Sunrise: A Song of Two Humans (1927)
Most beautiful silent movie ever!
This movie is a masterpiece. Simple story (man plots to kill life for other woman) but unbelievably beautiful shots, great performances (it's a shame Gaynor and, especially, O'Brien are forgotten today--they were wonderful actors) and beautiful music score more than compensate. Visually, this movie is incredible. They (obviously) spend millions building big, beautiful sets and it comes through. The sequence at the carnival is an eye popper. However the most incredible is near the beginning where the husband is seduced by the evil other woman in a swamp with a big beautiful moon overhead. Hard to believe this was a box office failure. Anyways, if you haven't seen it, see it! You won't be disappointed! Great date movie.
Outside Providence (1999)
OK, but what's the point?
So-so film about a young man sent to a prep school by his obnoxious dad, so he won't get sent to juvenile hall. That's it--the whole film. It's well done, well-acted, fairly good dialogue, but there's nothing to it. No conflict, no real problem, no nothing! I think the real problem here is editing...this film shows HEAVY signs of prerelease cutting. More than once events are referred too and never shown. And we're talking significant events, not just minor little things. A revelation at the end of the film makes no sense because if refers to (VERY casually) to something that we never saw! Also the kid supposedly has problems with his mother's death (and it leads to a big out of nowhere speech), but it's not even brought up until the end of the picture! So, what's left is an OK movie, just very jumbled and inconsequential. Worth a video rental on half-price night...maybe.
Yellow Submarine (1968)
Great movie, but not for kids
I saw this on TV when I was a kid, and I was bored silly. I thought it was dumb, slow and I hated the songs (go figure!). Now seeing it in its rerelease as an adult, I love it. The animation is pretty flat and the "story" is nonsensical. Some lousy dialogue too. But me and all the other adults in the theater loved it, loved the music now, and got all of the jokes. The movie is VERY G-rated, but it's not for kids. The ones in the theater I had were bored, restless and stone-faced through the entire film. ALL the jokes went over their heads (especially when a sign saying "The Rolling Stones" pops out of the submarine) and I heard more then one of them say, "This is STUPID!". A few left the theater complaining how bad the animation was. So it's worth seeing if you're an adult. The only kids who would appreciate it would be ones who like the Beatles.
The Sixth Sense (1999)
Excellent thriller
Superb horror/thriller about a little boy who can see dead people and Bruce Willis as a child psychiatrist trying to help him cope with it. The film is VERY quiet and very dark (it's filmed with everything in shadows or darkness...everything in this film looks dark). It also manages to scare you without blood or gore. The film also takes time to establish characters and motivation (how many horror films can you say that about?). It's a solid hour before the kid confides in Willis, but by then you know (and care) about him. Then, to top it off, there's an incredible twist at the end that makes you replay the whole film in your mind. If you like quiet, creepy horror thrillers see this film! It's 20 times better (and more unsettling) than "The Blair Witch Project".
The Astronaut's Wife (1999)
Long, slow, boring
Textbook example of how NOT to do a horror film. Take a decent premise (is her husband possessed by a monster from outer space?), slow it down as much as possible, instruct EVERYBODY to act like they're on Valium, throw in a lot of "artsy" camera shots like it's an art film, and give us one of the worst endings in cinema history and you've got one of the lousiest horror films ever! This film will (hopefully) be soon forgotten. Go see "I Married a Monster from Outer Space" instead.
Night Must Fall (1937)
Well-done but way too talky
This was originally a hit play. It shows. The characters sit around and talk, and talk, and talk, and TALK... It gets real boring real quick. It would be entertaining if the characters were interesting (they aren't). They range from annoying (the grandmother and Montgomery) to dull (everybody else, especially Russell). Also this is the kind of play where everybody takes 10 minutes to say something that could easily have been done in 3 minutes. Montgomery has WAY too many scenes like these. It's well directed and atmospheric but just too dull. Must have looked good at the time of its release, but not any more.
The Thomas Crown Affair (1999)
Half a good movie
This remake of the 1968 film is, during its first half, better than the original. It moves quickly, is well-directed and Brosnan and especially Russo are great. Cool sex scenes too. But halfway through Brosnan takes Russo to his island getaway (and I'm not giving anything away--it's in the coming attractions), and the movie falls apart. It still LOOKS good, but the story gets repititous, confusing, needlessly convoluted and downright boring. There's one good twist near the end but the very end is very insulting to the audience. The only thing that kept me watching during the second half is the excellent direction, great music score and (again) Brosnan and Russo. These two put to shame McQueen and Dunaway from the original (nice touch to have Dunaway play Crown's psychiatrist). Team them up together, hopefully with a better script.
Universal Soldier: The Return (1999)
Van Damme's worst (and that's saying something)!
1992's "Universal Soldier" was an exciting, fun and interesting action picture. This "sequel" is junk. It contradicted the first picture more times than I cared to count, had lousy acting (no shock there), a stupid plot (a computer taking over a military installation--wow, how original), and action scenes that were so badly directed I couldn't tell who was shooting here. By the end of the movie I didn't care. They try to cover this by playing ear-splitting rock music during every action sequence. All it did was give me a headache. Only 82 minutes but seems like 3 or 4 hours. Also it's very sad to see Michael Jai White reduced to this. He was very good in "Spwan(sp?)" two years ago. Then he did "Ringmaster" (anybody remember that one?) and now THIS? The poor guy deserves better. Also, I feel sorry for Van Damme. He can't act, but neither can Stallone or Schwazenegger and look how popular they are! A lousy, sad movie. Here's hoping White and Van Damme make something better next time.
Teaching Mrs. Tingle (1999)
OK movie, NOT a disaster
The reviews led me to believe this movie was horrendous. It's no great shakes, but it's not that bad. The plot is interesting (high school students tying up a mean old b**** of a teacher who's trying to ruin their lives), but writer/director Williamson doesn't let it go all out. He seems to be afraid to exploit the idea for all it's worth. Also there are HUGE gaps in logic (the teenagers unburden all their deep feelings to a teacher they have tied up and Mrs. Tingle is tied up for a day or two and never has to use the bathroom?) and the humor in the film doesn't really work. What keeps the film watchable is that it moves VERY quickly (it's just under 90 minutes) and the cast is pretty good. The best is Mirren as Mrs. Tingle. She's always been a good actress (she managed to make it through "Caligula" with her dignity intact), and she is obviously enjoying herself immensely. It's worth seeing just for her performance. So no great shakes, but no disaster either.
Jumpin' Jack Flash (1986)
Silly but lively
Not a great movie, but it is fun. Never a dull moment with Goldberg around. Also it's interesting as Penny Marshall's directorial debut and for the supporting cast(Tracy Ullman, Michael McKean, Phil Hartman, etc, etc.). The plot is convuluted and forgettable...basically it's an excuse for Goldberg to dress up and/or do imitations and comedy sctick (her impersonation of Diana Ross was hilarious)! A pretty good film.
Written on the Wind (1956)
Glossy, fun trash
The story of a heavily dysfunctional wealthy family is loads of fun. Dumb but fun dialogue, breathtaking settings, gorgeous outfits and racy (for its time) situations. What's not to like. Also Malone was perfection as a nymphomaniac...easy to see why she won an Oscar. Try to see a good print...the color is beautiful.
Humoresque (1946)
One of Crawford's best
Beautiful film about Crawford in love with violinist Garfield. Well directed, beautiful cinematography, wonderful music (of course--hard to believe that's not Garfield's hand playing the violin), but best of all is the acting. Garfield was totally believable especially when playing the violin. You could see he loved the music by the look on his face. Crawford was superb--one of her best performances ever. Her and Garfield played off each other perfectly...it's a shame they were never paired again. Also a shame this movie isn't better known. Don't miss this one!
A Woman's Face (1941)
One of Crawford's better films
Crawford has one of the more complex roles ever given her. Playing a scarred woman who hates everything and everybody, she shows depth in her performance that she'd never shown before. Director Cukor got her to tone done her usual overacting (no mean feat) and she beautifully underplays the role. Exciting story, beautiful settings, good acting, incredible directing...it's a wonder this film isn't better known. Well worth seeing, especially if you're a Crawford fan.
The Blair Witch Project (1999)
Scary but stomach-churning
Yes, this movie is VERY scary. I don't frighten easily, but this movie bothered me unlike any film since "Halloween". It manages to spook you with no gore, violence or things jumping out at you. It just uses darkness and other things (I don't want to give anything away). The acting is realistic and the dialogue sounds realistic (hard to believe it was all improvised). However, there's one HUGE problem with the film. It's the jerky hand-held camera work. By the end of the film, I was on the verge of throwing up! Imagine being on a rocking ship for an hour and a half straight...not a pleasant sensation. The camera work does work for the film, but it's just very difficult to sit through without getting severe stomach cramps. Well worth seeing (the final sequence can give you nightmares) but see it on an EMPTY stomach!
Trick (1999)
Sweet and light gay romantic comedy
Boy meets boy on the subway and they spend the rest of the night trying to find a place to "do it". That's the whole plot. What it is, is a sweet, light, likable gay romantic comedy. It's not perfect. Some jokes don't pan out and there are plenty of dead spots. When the script is funny it's hilarious. When it's not, it's sort of painful. What carries the movie through is the acting. Campbell is sweet and believable. Pitoc is handsome and has an incredible body (the scene where we see him dancing in a G string to "Dream Weaver" is incredible). His acting doesn't seem too good at first, but as the movie goes on, I realized he was underacting very nicely. As for Tori Sepelling...well, the less said the better. However she is perfectly cast as an untalented actress. There's a great monologue from a drag queen, some really funny moments and a very sweet, happy ending. A good movie, but no great shakes.
South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999)
Really sick and really funny
I'm no fan of the TV series "South Park". I've seen a handful of episodes and found them tasteless and stupid. Still, I decided to see the movie just because everyone I know who saw it, loved it. Well, I did too! Yes, it's VERY sick and crude but I could not stop laughing. This movie tears into everyone and everything. How it got by with an "R" rating is beyond me (not that I'm complaining!). If you're easily offended DO NOT see this movie. However if you have an open mind and like raunchy humor, this movie is for you!
Runaway Bride (1999)
Predictable but fun
OK, you know how this is going to end before it even begins (but don't worry, I won't give it away), but after a sssllllooooowwww start, the movie picks up speed and gets better and better as it goes along. The picture is totally devoid of reality (the town Roberts lives in does NOT exist in real life), and every character is cute and lovable. Somehow, though, I didn't care. WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD!!!! The writing was on target, the acting was perfect and when Roberts and Gere first kiss, the audience burst out applauding. You really get caught up in the characters and situations. It wasn't till after the movie was over, that I realized a major plot point (why Roberts keeps running out on weddings) was never explained. Still, it didn't matter. It was an entertaining fun two hours. What more can you ask from a movie?
The Haunting (1999)
What a piece of garbage!
1963's "The Haunting" is still one of the scariest horror films ever made. No blood, no gore, no special effects (except one) and it scares the hell out of you. Why try to remake it? Well, they did and, predictably, did a lousy job. First off, it looks great. The sets are incredible and take your breath away. Second everbody (except for Neeson) gives out good performances. This is particularly impressive when you realize how howlingly bad their dialogue is. The story was (unwisely) changed from the original (I'm still not quite sure who Neeson gets them all together--it sounds like to test fear????!!!!!). There are two HUGE gaps in the script--two other people are introduced at the beginning, one gets hurt, the other drives her to the hospital--and they're never mentioned again. The second one: when they try to leave the house when all hell breaks loose, the doctor says only the caretaker can let them out. However, earlier we had seen him unlock the gates himself! Those two lapses aside, the dialogue is incredible bad. I can't believe they actually let this script by. The audience was laughing at the lines! (Also there's a plot twist at the end that was so ridiculous, I yelled out "Oh come on!" and audience members applauded me!) Also it's not scary. The special effects are impressive, but you're always aware that they are special effects. I only jumped once (when a skeleton pops up). Let's see, horrible script, lapses in logic, ridiculous plot twists, nonscary...a must miss basically. If you want to be scared, rent the original. You'll be much better off.