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Frank-97
Reviews
John Wick (2014)
Booooooring!!!
WOW! This movie was a monumental bore! The "story" would barely make two pages of text. Former assassin retires, marries the girl of his dreams. He inherits her adorable little dog. Thugs teal his car and murder his dog. John Wick decides to kill lots of people involved.
Shoots up clubs in NYC where dozens of people are gunned down. Does the NYPD make even a token appearance? NAHHH! Simply put, this movie was stupefyingly boring!
It is hard to know what else to say about a movie that has so little substance. Quite frankly, the movie simply became silly, but not in a good sense...it just dragged on and on and on....
3:10 to Yuma (2007)
Excellent movie until the end - the original film was better
***********SPOILERS****************
I thoroughly enjoyed this remake, despite some over the top excesses, but the ending spoiled it for me. The actions just made no sense. While I understand that Ben Wade had come to respect Dan Evans a great deal, it still made no sense for him to then murder his own men for saving his life by killing Dan. Just too far fetched! I saw the remake two nights ago and the original last night. While there is much I liked and admired in the remake, as I said, I thought the ending made very little sense. I was very curious to see how the original ended...as it turns out it was COMPLETELY different and to my mind much better and more logical.
In the original, Dan does not get shot, so of course Ben Wade does not shoot his own men (totally nonsensical in the remake!). BOTH men jump on the train and escape the ambush by Wade's men. When Dan asks Wade why he not only saved him but got on the train to the prison with him, Wade said that he didn't like owing anything to anybody. Dan had saved his life (earlier in the original film) and so now they were even...besides "I've escaped from Yuma prison before anyway!" This ending made infinitely more sense to me than the remake...it is a shame they changed it so much.
Christmas with the Kranks (2004)
Just bloody awful!
This is the WORST "Christmas" movie I have ever seen! Talk about the Grinch! EVERY character in this movie is someone I would be horrified to know! There is nothing redeeming about this travesty. It is not funny, the characters are beyond caricatures, the story is stupid and the people inhabiting it are unpleasant in every way...
Tim Allen makes his career now with bad Christmas movies it seems, the neighbors in this movie are almost demonic in their disdain for ANYONE who dares not indulge in commercial excess in the celebration of Christmas and the way they try to suddenly come to the rescue is just awful!
Avoid like the plague!
Crash (2004)
AWFUL Hollywood claptrap
I believe this is without doubt the WORST movie ever to win Best Picture. Previously I handed that to either Rocky (because its competition of All The President's Men, Network, Taxi driver and Bound for Glory were all far superior) or Shakespeare In Love (Saving Private Ryan was INFINITELY better). Crash though does not deserve any sort of consideration at all. It is smug, pretentious and has more ridiculous and heavy handed plot twists than any major movie I ever saw.
*SPOILER* Example: Two cops stop a car driven by a black couple. The bigoted white cop proceeds to fondle the woman as he "frisks" her as the husband asks politely to be allowed to go with just a warning. The cop lets them go. His partner is repulsed and asks for a transfer. Later on the bigoted cop rescues the very same woman from a car wreck nanoseconds before the car explodes. Still later the partner picks up a black hitch hiker and then gets angry at him presumably for laughing at him. The black man protests that he was not laughing at him and for some reason digs in his pocket. The "good" cop tells him to take his hand from his pocket. When the black man doesn't do it fast enough the cop shoots and kills him only to discover the black man was reaching not for a gun but for a St. Christopher medal! PUH-LEEZE! Stupid ridiculous garbage made worse because it lured me in with a very promising first third that proceeded to go quickly and steadily downhill. The type of movie that Hollywood sorts love because they think it shows "real life"...
Drivel
A Christmas Story (1983)
My Favorite Christmas Movie!
I have seen this film literally dozens of times over the past 20+ years and I STILL find myself laughing out loud throughout it! It is a joy...a treat...an incredible period piece of what Christmas was like when I grew up (although the time of this movie predates me by about 10 years as I grew up in the 50s and not the 40s as in A Christmas Story).
Darren McGavin is brilliant as the father...a masterful performance as the befuddled Dad obsessed by his furnace and the smelly hound dogs next door! Peter Billingsly is terrific as Ralphie in his quest for the perfect gift, a Red Ryder air rifle...his daydream sequences are wonderful...seriously, haven't you done JUST as he does when YOU were a little kid? Watch it, enjoy it and have a MERRY CHRISTMAAS!!!!
Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003)
Stupid and pointless
No plot...no story at all to speak of...just non-stop cartoon violence. The blood spurting from severed limbs ad infinitum reminded me of Monty Python's Black Knight in the Holy Grail. I found this movie to be a monumental waste of time and boring as hell! Leave your brain at the door! Far too many talented people were involved in this for the end result to be so pointless.
The Villain (1979)
Live action Road Runner cartoon!!
I first saw this movie in the theater when it was originally released. I had NO IDEA what it was about and I was kind of puzzled at first by it...then I really got into it and laughed uproariously throughout!!! Every crazy Road Runner gag is hauled out and used...and it works!!! Totally silly, totally nonsensical...but very very funny!!! How can you go wrong with a movie that has Paul Lynde as an Indian named Nervous Elk???? Leave your grumpiness at the door...get into a goofy mood and enjoy this flick!!!
Lovers and Other Strangers (1970)
A Wonderful Movie
This is a very warm and extremely funny film that for some reason seems to have been totally forgotten. It has a fine ensemble cast including Gig Young, Harry Guardino, Jerry Stiller, Anne Meara, Bea Arthur, Diane Keaton and Richard Castellano (So Richie...what's the story?).Buy it, rent it, SEE it!! A lost classic to be sure..and it features the wonderful Carpenters song "For All We Know". This movie is a gem!
Hannibal (2001)
Pure Garbage!
While I thought Silence of the Lambs was a taut, exciting, albeit very violent film, Hannibal is merely an exercise in grossness and bad taste. I found the movie utterly hideous with virtually no redeeming value. I'm surprised so many top notch actors participated in such junk. It is an exercise in violence for violence sake. The plot is minimal, the acting certainly good, but nothing extraordinary. I found it repulsive...one of the only movies I have walked out on.
Planet of the Apes (2001)
Great movie until the end!
I thought Tim Burton's "Planet of the Apes" was an exciting, enjoyable remake of the original that exceeded my expectations....UNTIL the absurd ending that was nothing more than a cynical ploy by Burton to make you wait for the sequel and then pay good money again to find out what it meant. I won't reveal the ending, but it made me change my vote from around an 8 to a 3...it ruined the movie for me. Be forewarned!