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Hulk (2003)
3/10
I didn't think the story of The Hulk could be boring...
19 June 2003
...but boy, was I wrong. Can I have the last two hours and fifteen minutes of my life back? The story is tortuously slow. The lead actor has no charisma, and the lead couple have no chemistry. We're not involved in Bruce's character, and don't really care what happens to him. It seems like forever until The Hulk actually appears, and when he does, he looks like Shrek on steroids. Literally the only positive things in the movie are Sam Neill's performance, and some moments of Nick Nolte's. Luckily, I got to see a sneak preview for free. If you think this review was bad, believe me... it would have been much worse if I'd paid to sit through this.
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6/10
Suspense? What suspense?
30 September 1999
I was rather disappointed in this film. The trailers and video slip cover would have you believe this film is a suspense thriller. It isn't. There is zero suspense or mystery in the movie, and it would be better if there were. Will Smith's *character* is not aware of what is happening to him or who is responsible for it through most of the film. But the *viewer* knows all along who did what, why they did it, why they're after him...even exactly what they're doing to try and trap him. What could have been an edge-of-your-seat conspiracy thriller is reduced to a ho-hum action flick as we watch chase scene after chase scene where we know exactly who the chaser and chasee are.

The movie isn't badly made or anything. It's just very standard fare. It looked like it would be better, and with a subtle shift in focus, it could have been much better. I felt like I was the victim of a bait-and-switch.

I give it a 5 out of 10. This movie is almost the textbook definition of an average picture.
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Edtv (1999)
7/10
The Opposite of The Truman Show-shouldn't be compared to it.
26 September 1999
Most of the comments here compare EdTV -- flatteringly or unflatteringly -- to The Truman Show. This is a totally invalid comparison in my opinion, unless you intend to compare opposites. EdTV is almost the opposite of The Truman Show. Where The Truman Show was about TV as the ultimate deception (a man is totally shielded from the real world, and his fictionalized life is exposed without his knowledge for the amusement of the masses), EdTV is about TV as the ultimate truth-teller (a man is totally revealed to the real world, and his real life is exposed with his full knowledge for the amusement of the masses). Perhaps they're flip sides of the same coin, but they are definitely flip sides...calling it any kind of imitation of The Truman Show misses the point of the film. Its the antithesis of The Truman Show.

As to quality, it is generally solid if not spectacular. There is a bit of a TV-ish quality to it...it would work just as well as a made-for-TV movie as on the big screen. It also suffers a little from some unbelievable moments showing how Ed can't have a private conversation with anyone without a camera six inches from his face. It's done for effect, but there's no reason the cameras couldn't have gotten the exact same picture from further away by simply zooming in. The performances are all pretty good. I especially liked Jenna Elfman as Ed's suddenly overexposed girlfriend. The screenplay is witty in places, if unremarkable.

All in all, a worthwhile look at an extreme example of the voyeuristic nature of modern entertainment. A good rental. I give it 7 out of 10.
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Pirates of Silicon Valley (1999 TV Movie)
3/10
Yeah...sure. I'm sure that's JUST how it happened...
10 September 1999
The best thing about this film was the casting of Anthony Michael Hall and Noah Wylie. They both portray their characters just fine. The problem is that the film is just comically inaccurate. I realize it's not intended to be a history, but some of the stuff in this is *so* wrong, that it gets in the way. A phenomenal oversimplification and rewriting of both Apple's story and Microsoft's. Slow-moving and unbelievable. Save your time. I give it a 3 out of 10, solely on the strength of well-done acting performances.
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Pleasantville (1998)
6/10
Visually stunning, but flawed.
28 March 1999
It's a great and original idea, and it's a visual masterpiece. But "Pleasantville" didn't quite live up to what I thought its potential was. The plot itself seems rather aimless. By that, I mean that it touches on a few themes here and there such as racism and how change can polarize a community, but it never really does anything with them. You never get any sense of why you should really care what's going to happen next from anything other than a visual point of view. There are also some rather large and obvious plot holes, such as how Jennifer's disappearance is going to be explained to her mother. Pleasantville was written, produced and directed by the same person. Sometimes, such a singular vision can prevent a movie from being watered down; other times, it can cause a movie to not reach its potential. In this case, it seems the latter has happened. The performances are all solid, but the film just seems to me like it needed a story editor to go through it a few times and tighten it up. I gave it a 7 for good performances, original concept, and technical excellence, but it could have gotten a higher rating if it had been tighter.
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Dirty Work (1998)
1/10
Save your money...
20 December 1998
This is a terrible film. The writing is obvious and predictable

and the acting is either flat (from actors like Chevy Chase who

have been able to act before) or non-existent (from Norm

McDonald, who proves that as an actor he makes an excellent

stand-up comedian). I wasn't expecting it to be great, but

given the premise, I at least expected the revenge gags to be

funny. They're not. They're flat too. The entire movie

generated less than five chuckles, and at least two of those

were laughing *at* the movie...not with it. The worst film I've

seen in a while.
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6/10
Meandering and off the mark
20 December 1998
The Coens are fully capable of making great films. This isn't

one of them. It's imaginatively directed, and the performances

are fine. But the story is so meandering and odd that it just

doesn't work. The Coens are willing to risk oddity in search of

excellence, and it frequently works; Fargo was a masterpiece.

But here it just seems muddled and pointless. I give it a 5 out

of 10.
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Pulp Fiction (1994)
7/10
Well done...but was it worth doing?
3 November 1998
It's brilliantly written, superbly acted, and imaginatively directed. Having said that, I can't honestly say I liked this movie at all. There's nothing wrong with a movie being disturbing or making you uncomfortable, but Pulp Fiction seems to do so without any real reason. A movie is meant to either entertain or educate (or both). Pulp Fiction is too over-the-top grotesque in parts for me to find it entertaining, and the gruesomeness does not redeem itself by being educational. Well made, but not worth making in my opinion. I give it a 7. Strong quality of work, but not successful enough in its approach to rate higher.
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8/10
Fantastically fun part-spoof, part-tribute
3 November 1998
This is not a great movie. It's campy and overacted (deliberately). But it's *so* much fun that it's impossible not to like it. John Carpenter's film spends half its time cutting up on the conventions of the martial arts film genre, and the other half using them brilliantly itself. It's certainly not for everyone, but it's zany, fun, and extremely successful at what it's trying to do. Even though it's no award-winner, I give it an 8 for sheer enjoyment.
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9/10
Arguably the best family movie ever made
3 November 1998
A treat from start to finish. Gene Wilder is brilliant as the eccentric Willy Wonka, and despite the (now) primitive special effects, the chocolate factory is as wondrous today as ever. Watchable over and over again. I give it a strong 9.
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