Change Your Image
Subzero7
Reviews
La La Land (2016)
I so wanted to love this.
I went in expecting something wonderful like Chicago, or Moulin Rouge, but instead was treated to mediocre at best. The acting was good, the sound was OK, but there was nothing "best" about it. I don't know how it was able to garner ANY Oscar nominations. There just wasn't anything Oscar worthy about it. It was trying to had to hearken back to the days of Fred Astaire, and Ginger Rogers and failed miserably. The singing wasn't that great either. I like both of the star actors, but this just wasn't the right vehicle for them. Their singing was just OK. The songs were nothing memorable that I would want the sound track for. The only really good song was the one sung by John Legend. The City of Stars was a nice little ditty, but that about it. The whole movie from beginning to end was just underwhelming. Both my partner and I felt the same way walking out. In fact, his first words were, "Well that's four hours we'll never get back." I said, "It was only two hours." He said, "EXACTLY." Oh well, I guess you can't like everything.
Bridge to Terabithia (2007)
For kids, and KIDS ONLY! Possible spoilers
If Disney was trying for a family film for "kids of all ages," they failed miserably. This movie is ONLY for kids. And I would go a step further and say that it was only for kids between the ages of 7 to 10; maybe 11 at the most. That's not to say that there won't be some older kids and adults that won't like it, but I would expect most older kids won't and adults only go because they half to take their kids to see it. But I would say it is too intense for kids under the age or 7 (maybe 8).
A movie about a young boy and girl that meat at a new school and become friends. Both have strong imaginations that let them find and play in a secluded area of the forest that they live by. They deem it to be a fantasy world of beauty. With castles and giants and other fantasy people and creatures.
The movie deals with school playground politics and first loves as it follows the two main characters. It also deals a little with they subject of God and death.
I was surprised to see the banter between the two main stars and the boy's little sister over God and hell and speculation about believing the bible and "being damned to hell." While I don't have a problem with kids discussing such things, it seemed a little out of place in the movie. It didn't seem to need to be there. Even many in the audience made gasps or sounds of surprise as well as a few comments like, "Disney is going to get letters about this." Usually Disney "family" films don't have any language in them but in this one, besides the kids talking about being "damned to hell," the dad says "damn" several times. And then there is sequence dealing with the death. Again I don't have a problem with death in the movie but I think that parents with kids under the age of about 7, should not let them see this movie for another couple of years. Wait until it comes out on video and see it at home.
My biggest gripe, though, is that the trailer made this movie out to be along the lines of Chronicles of Narnis. Where the kids actually do stumble into a fantasy land and help save it from some bad guys. But, it is NOTHING like that. It is, instead, just about kids using their imaginations and pretending. That is just fine for kids but I don't want to see it.
It was WAY too sappy for me, and I would expect for most older kids and adults as well. Usually when a movie is mainly for kids, it's rated G and advertised as a children's movie. If that would have been the case, then I would have had to sit through this drudge.
Again for kids, it's an excellent movie, but for older kids and adults, not so much. It is because of this fact, that they advertised it as a film the whole family could enjoy, when clearly it is not, that I'm only giving it a neutral score of 5 and not more.
The acting is descent and the special effects are excellent, but that is not enough to overcome the feeling that I needed a shot of insulin after seeing it to deal with how sugary it was.
Take your kids if you must, but otherwise, wait until it comes out of video so that you can put it in and let them watch it while you do something else.
Epic Movie (2007)
Don't bother
This is literally one of the worst movies I have every seen. It's the first movie at least 10 years or more that I actually walked out half way through it. I usually stay to the end because I keep hoping that something will happen to make it worth it, but this time, I just couldn't do it.
The acting was horrible. It looks as if the script was written by the writers by simply going on a drinking binge then eating a lot and then throwing up, looking at the random chunks, and then trying to visualize letters that formed words, and then writing those imagined words down as the script. Then what you see on the screen, is the end result.
I love spoof movies. Naked Gun series was excellent. The Scary Movie series was pretty good as well. Scary Movie 1 was excellent; number 2 was good, 3 had a few good moments but wasn't that great, and 4 was about as good as number 2.
I do love a good spoof movie and had hight hopes for this movie. The trailer made it look great (as they are supposed to do) but in the end, it was simply worthless. I can't even believe it got the green light to be made. Another disappointment is that they had some good actors for what they were doing and they still couldn't pull it off. Jennifer Coolidge, the White Bitch, was great for that role. She is good in these types of roles but it didn't help. Really, she is the ONLY one that was any good in any of the roles.
If you haven't seen this movie yet, DON'T GO!!! Don't even rent it on video, it's not even worth that. I know there are a few people that have given this a rating of 10. I would say that they were either joking, being sarcastic, or slept through the whole thing and didn't want to admit it.
Simply put, don't bother!!!!
Hellraiser: Deader (2005)
Could have and SHOULD have been better
Well it wasn't the worst I've seen (Hellseeker and Hellworld took care of that) but it really could have and SHOULD have been better. The acting wasn't bad but the script was. The story wasn't bad either, it was just poor execution. There just wasn't enough Pinhead. Was he in it even 10 minutes? The whole point to the Hellraiser franchise it blood and gore and sadism. A good story and decent acting is nice but if they don't include lots of Pinhead coming out of walls with other Cenobites to rip the flesh from their victims or to wrap them up in barbed wire and stretch their eyelids up to their foreheads or or their lower lips down to there neck. Or have a bit in their mouth while chains with hooks are ripping the chest open exposing their organs, then what is the point.
Simply put, it was WAY too tame for a Hellraiser movie. The same goes for Hellworld which was simply dumb. Again decent acting but a rotten script. I can only hope that someone will pick up the torch that has some talent and run with it. Maybe, someone could convince Clive Barker to pick up the pen and write another REAL Hellraiser film as a final tribute to, overall, a good franchise (we'll just forget 6, 7, and 8 ever existed).
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)
Not bad but not great either
I had high hopes for this film but I was a bit let down. The story is great and so is the acting. In fact if it weren't for Johnny Depp's excellently done character then I wouldn't even recommend the movie at all. The biggest problem (and it's a big one indeed) is that this movie is really slow in spots. If they would cut it down at least 30 minutes then it would have been better. Too many spots where it just dragged on and on.
The fight sequences are good but too few. Over all I basically enjoyed the film but not like I had hoped. Personally I think League of Extraordinary Gentlemen was better. This movie is worth seeing though it just could have been better. But you'll LOVE Johnny Depp as Capt. Jack Sparrow. :)
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)
Excellent!!!!!
I don't know why some people have a problem with this movie. Are they just dumb?! I know everyone has their opinion and that just fine but reading some reviews it seems that people are just taking this movie WAY too seriously. The movie doesn't take itself seriously so why should the public. IT'S FANTASY PEOPLE!!!! You know; not real. It's not supposed to be the uplifting, heart warming, life affirming movie of the year. It's just supposed to be fun and that is exactly what it is.
With the always excellent acting of Sean Conery as well an excellent supporting cast, this movie is very fun and WELL WORTH going to see at full price. On a scale of 1 to 10 it gets a 10. It has tons of action and VERY well done fight scenes. And of course the special effects are excellent. The story IS great and moves along at a perfect pace. At just shy of 2 hours, it seems to fly by and doesn't drag at all. I was even a little sad that it was over and I wanted to turn around and see it again. Yes it's over the top but that falls under they category or DUHHH!!!! After all, it is based on a comic book. They always are over the top. That's the point.
Anyway, if you go into this movie expecting something that will change your life (like many silly critics and other people seem to have done) then you will be VERY disappointed. But, if you go into it expecting a fun, over the top, movie to get away from everyday life, then you should be very pleased. This movie is just plain fun no matter which way you slice it. So enjoy and feel good about paying full price to see it. :)
The Transporter (2002)
Decent first try.
This film was fun. I get the feeling that it is a first try at action films for whoever was the director (I don't know that thought). Maybe a first film altogether. At any rate it seems like a new film for several of the actors also. It was pretty well done and the acting is decent. The effects weren't exactly top notch but decent. The plot and overall story were very good. I think that if the director of this film keeps doing action films that we can expect good things in the long run. While this film won't win any awards, it was still fun and worth seeing.
Mad Monster Party? (1967)
Loads of fun and about to come out on DVD.
I remember this from when I was a kid. It was outrageously funny. I've been looking for this for years without success and then, BOOM!!!, I find out today (6/3/02) that it's coming out on DVD on 7/23/02. I CAN'T WAIT. It really is funny. Anyone young or old CAN enjoy this film. After all, you've got Phyllis Diller. What else do you need. :)
July is so far away.
Vanilla Sky (2001)
A bizzar story.
I really can't recommend this movie. It's way too bizzaro and kind of disjointed. In a way it's kind of Kubric-esque (that's not necessarily a good thing). Ultimately it gets explained (and that's all I'll say about that) but that's not enough to really redeem it. The acting was superb and I think the directing was also good but I think the script left much to be desired. At least as they decided to film it anyway. It does have it's moments but not enough to help. If you must go see it then do it on a matinee or wait until it's on pay per view or rental.
Scary Movie 2 (2001)
What a disappointment. Don't bother with this one.
I'm a movie nut and like just about everything so it takes a lot for me to not like a movie. But SCARY MOVIE 2 achieves that. This is very unfortunate because the first one was so good.
There are some humorous moments in 2 but overall the ball was dropped and never recovered. After watching this film, I basically feel they must have thought to themselves, "Gee, the first one did so well we could just throw this one together and toss it out there and it will do well just on the merits of the first one." And based on the first weekend gross that maybe what happens.
It basically felt like the just threw the movie together without any real thought for the script at all. I don't they think they gave any real attention to detail, writing or anything. This is very sad because one of the best types of film genres there is, is parody. Look at the NAKED GUN films. The original SCARY MOVIE was excellent but number 2 just tanks.
Strangely enough, I hope they do a number 3 because I think there is so much good material to use but I hope they decide to give it some time and thought and try to actually make it good instead of just tossing something out there for a quick buck. Based on the $35mil it made on it's opening weekend (and I expect a fairly low budget), I'm sure this one will make money but I'd be willing to bet that it won't come close to the first when all is said and done. After a big opening weekend and, I expect, a mediocre second weekend, I am expecting this one to drop out of site and go to video quickly.
Personally, I feel that if you haven't already seen it, then don't bother. If you really feel you must see this one, then wait until it comes out to rent. Or better yet wait until it's on HBO or Showtime (or whoever ends up with it). But if you can at all go without it, then don't even both with it when it comes out on video. It's just not worth it. :(
Cats & Dogs (2001)
An enjoyable film.
This move is quite fun. No award winner but really enjoyable. Kids will love this film but I think most adults will too. Sean Hayes as the evil cat was excellent and quite funny. Yes it was a little hokey but hey, I wasn't expecting anything different. Jeffrey Goldblum's performance left a little to be desired but considering the role, it was allright.
Overall I was quite pleased with all the animal characters and laughed quite a bit throughout the film. I definitely recommend this film but try to see it on a matinee.
Angel Eyes (2001)
Good film but a little slow.
This film wasn't at all what the trailer made it out to be (to me). I was expecting a thriller but instead it simply tried to be an emotional piece bringing two lonely hearts together and making them face their fears along the way with each other's help (unwanted or not). It really is a good film overall with great acting but it's a quite slow in parts. Just when you begin to think that something needs to happen to move it along, it does but it's short lived. I enjoyed this film but it seemed to to be missing something to give it a higher rating than a six. I do recommend it but I would see it during a matinee and save the bigger bucks for Shrek or Pearl Harbor or Mummy Returns. But enjoy, because overall it is a pretty good flick. :)
The Mummy Returns (2001)
Wonderful!!
I really liked this film. While it didn't have quite the edge the first one had, it was every bit as fun with plenty of silly humor and of course grand special effects to go with it. I hope they make another film with the same actors. Maybe a different story but another. This could be another franchise like Indiana Jones. :)
A Knight's Tale (2001)
Great flick
This was a wonderful film with some interesting use of music. I mostly uses music from the past 30 years and not the period type of music that you would expect. But it was well placed. Aside from a little corniness during the ball scene (and not bad corniness either) the movie was perfect and quite refreshing. I recommend it to anyone who likes a good jousting period piece with just a tad of modern flare. :)
Shrek (2001)
Loads of fun!
This film was sooo much fun. I laughed my ars off. :) Great acting and great humor. You could tell the actors were having lots of fun with this one and the makers weren't trying to make it into something it wasn't. Mainly for older teens and adults this film a little bit for everyone at least ten or older but fits better with fifteen or older. There are some cute characters for younger kids but the humor is definitely over their heads. Go see this film and enjoy. :)
The Pledge (2001)
One of the worst movies ever (possible spoiler)
There is only one good thing about this movie and that is the acting. Other than that (and it's not enough) this is one of the worst movies ever. It started out interesting but after about 20 minutes it just got plain boring. Naturally they show the best scenes in the trailers. We went in with great expectations and came out SOOOOOO disappointed! What a let down. The worst part was the end. It was so bad that it made the good acting and the interesting first 20 minutes or so and ruined it completely. If they had just made the ending work better instead of leaving Jack's character a basic vegetable then it would have been worth it but the screwed it up royally. We weren't the only ones who felt this way. As we were sitting through the credits waiting for the bulk of the crowd to thin, we heard person after person as they walked by to leave talking about how horrible the movie was and how crapy the end was. Based on the numbers on this site apparent lots of people liked this movie. I'll never know why but hey, to each his/her own. Personally I haven't felt so much like I just wasted a whole evening in a long time. I was actually mad at myself for not going to see something...anything else. Oh well. I guess that after seeing excellent film after excellent film there was bound to be a piece of crap that would show up eventually. If you want to see a thriller, go see Antitrust.
The Gift (2000)
Pretty good flick
This was a very good film with some nice jumpy moments it in. Cate Blanchett does and excellent job. Everyone had good performances. Giovanni Ribisi's performance was one of the best. He's a real up-and-comer. The story is well done and I think the directing was excellent as evidenced by the smoothly running performances. The end, while good, could have had a couple more elements in it but it doesn't hurt the film. I definitely recommend this film.
Mission: Impossible II (2000)
What a great film!!!!
This movie was the best. Granted you must remember "suspension of disbelief." I and four friends went to see it on Sun. and we all walked out loving it. The critics didn't appear to like it. That right there is a good indication that it will be good. Critics never know what they're talking about anyway. :) I recommend the movie to everyone. It was exciting, suspenseful, action filled. It was a nail biter. Go see it and enjoy.
Bats (1999)
Could have/should have been much better
This movie is one of the first from a new fledgling movie studio so I guess I can forgive it's general stupidity. Lou D. P. is a decent actor but is prone to overacting and in this one he REALLY does. He's good in roles that call for that but in this one he was passable in the first half but it wasn't until the 2nd half to last 1/3 that his overacting was offset by the action of the film. The acting overall left somewhat to be desired and the film was rather boring during the first half. During the 2nd half it finally began to wake up and come to life and about the last 1/3 was actually enjoyable. It didn't have enough of a budget to do it up right. Mind you, I realize that having a big budget and lots of flashy well done effects don't guarantee a good film or a hit but it certainaly helps when the movie is an effects type of movie as this. Again they're a new company and don't appear to have the backing of a major studio so it can be forgiven as growing pains. On the other hand because of the low budget (12 mil) they're likely to do well enough to make a profit and maybe to more with future pictures. The movie is ok to see but I'd make sure it is either a matinee or even wait until video. It's just not worth the full price. But if you go see it, don't walk out. Go ahead and stay through the end because it does get better in the last part.
House on Haunted Hill (1999)
Pretty good flick
I was a little worried about this movies because it's a new production company and their first movies tend to be a little on the not so great side (point in case..BATS) but this one was backed by (and maybe owned by I don't know) Warner's so they had a budget to work with and access to all the other good things a major studio offers. Anyway, I was pleasantly surprised by this movie. It had good acting and the script was great. The special effects were well done overall and it had plenty of good jumpy moments to put you on the edge of your seat. Overall a pretty good first attempt. And a nice little twist that at least I wasn't expecting (and I'll be most that are honest weren't either). Anyway, this is a movie worth seeing.
The Blair Witch Project (1999)
One of the crappiest movies ever made!!!
The "one line summary" pretty much says it but in a little detail, the spend 95 percent of the movie screaming at each other over whose at fault for whatever with a couple night time sequences of them screaming over a couple of faint noises. OOOOOHHHHH!!! Scary!!! Oh please!!! The only scene that was any good (and it wasn't good either because it didn't explain anything) was the last scene. This movie just wasn't remotely scary or interesting or fun. It totally blows my mind that anyone liked this movie and that it didn't just flop big time. The writers and makers should be thrown in jail for such a travesty of movie justice. Oh well, to each his/her own of course.
The Astronaut's Wife (1999)
Potential not realized.
This was a movie that had great potential but it ended up being slow and an anti-climax. The story was good and the acting was well done but it just had too many dead spots. I was expecting at least more action and thrill if not more special effects; it didn't happen. Depp's acting was perfect and I love his performances but I'll hope for better in SLEEPY HOLLOW. If you haven't seen it then I would wait for the video. It was ok but not worth the price of a theatre ticket.
Mickey Blue Eyes (1999)
Lots of fun
This movie is one that I classify as a "frustrating comedy." That means that it's really funny and enjoyable but instead of having a fare number of bad moments and good moments strung evenly together, it starts out happy and then has one bad thing after another happen to the character without and good things to break up the monotony. Then at the end BOOM a REALLY good thing happens to make up for all of it and give it a happy ending. For a better understanding, think of the movie THE MONEY PIT. It is a perfect example of a "frustrating comedy." I didn't even like that movie. Now this movie isn't nearly that bad but it none the less fits the category. It is however well done and funny and I really enjoyed it. So I do recommend it to anyone that likes comedy.
The 13th Warrior (1999)
Good movie but....
This was good movie. The acting was good by all. The trailer, though; kind of made the movie out to be a little on the super natural side (which is one of my favorite genres) which it turned out not to be. Plus there wasn't enough action and a couple of slow spots. None the less it was a good flick that could have been a little better overall. With the good acting and some action and a couple of minor (near) nail biting scenes, it is worth seeing.
The Sixth Sense (1999)
Excellent flick with a twist
I won't give the twist away but this movie is more than it's trailers make it out to be. I suggest it to every one. The acting and story are great and believable. Bruce Willis does an excellent job and Haley Joel Osment does a perfect job for his role as well. I don't feel there really is a way to talk much about this movie without giving away the end so just take my advice and go see it. It's well worth it.