Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (TV Series)

Kimmy Kisses a Boy! (2015)

Sara Chase: Cyndee Pokorny

Quotes 

• Cyndee Pokorny : My fiancé and I have decided to return to Durnsville, the city that never sleeps.

  Kimmy Schmidt : Is that siren still going off?

• Kimmy Schmidt : What the H-E-double - No. You know what? What the hell, Brandon?

  Cyndee Pokorny : Kimmy! Don't use that kind of language in front of a unicorn!

• Cyndee Pokorny : Don't I deserve to be happy? I'm a Mole Woman.

  Kimmy Schmidt : No. That is not going to work with me. I'm a Mole Woman too, but I'm trying to move past it.

  Cyndee Pokorny : Are you? 'Cause I'm actually doing what I said I was gonna do back in the bunker. You were gonna see the world and get an education and a great job! But you're a 29-year-old babysitter who lives in a basement!

  Kimmy Schmidt : Well, at least I have a boyfriend who isn't fake, Cyndee.

  Cyndee Pokorny : He's my fake fiancé, Kimmy. And we're gonna live a beautiful fake life together!

• Brandon : I'm Brandon.

  [hugs Kimmy] 

  Kimmy Schmidt : Oh!

  Brandon : So good to meet you. And I've got more luggage to get. This one does not pack light.

  Cyndee Pokorny : I don't know why I brought so much pancake mix!

• [Cyndee's phone rings] 

  Cyndee Pokorny : Ooh! It's the Durnsville Board of Education. This year, I get to pick the chapter that gets taken out of the science textbook.

• Kimmy Schmidt : Listen to me: Don't listen to me. You get to live your life the way you want. That's the whole point of not being in a bunker. No one gets to tell you what to do. And I think part of me is jealous of you, 'cause you really do have everything you want. You just took a shortcut to get there, and I can't do it that way.

  Cyndee Pokorny : You're gonna take the road less traveled!

  Kimmy Schmidt : I guess so, Cyndee.

  Cyndee Pokorny : Even though that's exactly how you got kidnapped!