- Ted Mosby: Eight years ago I made an ass of myself chasing after you and I made an ass of myself chasing after you a bunch of times since then. I have no regrets because it led me to something I wouldn't trade for the world, it led to you being my friend. So as your friend and a leading expert in the field of making an ass of yourself. I say to you, from the heart, get the hell out of this car.
- Robin Scherbatsky: [Robin has read the play entitled "The Robin" and sees Barney] Seriously, Barney? Even you, even someone as CERTIFIABLY INSANE as you must realize that this is too far! You lied to me, manipulated me for weeks - do you really think I could ever kiss you after that? Do you really think I could ever trust you after that?
- [refers to Playbook page]
- Robin Scherbatsky: This, this is proof of why we don't work, why we'll never work, so thank you. You've set me free because how could I be with a man who thinks that this trick, this enormous lie could ever make me want to date him again?
- Barney Stinson: Turn it over.
- [Robin flips page to read Step 16: Hope she says yes. Barney presents ring]
- Barney Stinson: Robin Scherbatsky, will you marry me?
- Robin Scherbatsky: Yes.
- Ted Mosby: I need to grow up. Oh by the way I'm breaking a jinx swear here so don't tell Barney or he gets to whack me in the nuts three times with a whiffle ball bat.
- Marshall Eriksen: Sure, pretty standard.
- Lily Aldrin: Okay but hurry, or I'm gonna start doing number eleven on my own.
- Marshall Eriksen: You can do that by yourself?
- Lily Aldrin: Pilates bitch!
- Ted Mosby: [to Robin about Barney's marriage proposal] So, what do you wanna do?
- Ranjit: [rolling down the divider] Robin, I do not want to meddle, but this is like the classic love song says...
- [Ranjit starts singing loudly and off key in a foreign language]
- Ted Mosby: Ranjit! Ranjit, let's just communicate via text from now on, okay?