Prince Avalanche (2013)

Paul Rudd: Alvin

Photos 

Quotes 

• Alvin : True love is just like a ghost - people talk about it but very few have actually seen it.

• Alvin : There's a difference between being lonely and being alone.

• Alvin : I was running, and then I reached the cliff, and all I know is I wanted to either fly or kill myself.

• Truck Driver : You know what? You shouldn't smoke.

  Alvin : Yeah, I know, it's bad for ya.

  Truck Driver : No, I mean *you* shouldn't smoke. You look stupid.

• Lance : Hey, Alvin. If you were in a regional beauty pageant, and you were a girl, what would your special talent be?

  Alvin : Triple Jump.

• [last lines] 

  Alvin : If there was a woman in that truck - I'm not saying that there is - but if there was, would you be good to her?

  Truck Driver : HUH?

  Alvin : Would you be good to her? Would you make sure that everything is okay?

  Truck Driver : You better believe it.

  [drives away] 

• [first lines] 

  Alvin : [about cassette tape]  Hey! What are you doing?

  Lance : I was falling asleep. I thought it would be a good idea to change the station situation.

  Alvin : It wasn't. I was listening to that.

  Lance : I know, but it's boring for the rest of us. I was falling asleep doing the work.

  Alvin : So what?

  Lance : So, I wanna play this tape. I wanna play this play to get motivated and pumped up, ya know?

  Alvin : I know, I know you want to play that tape. Look, you know what, Lance, I'm not here to start a fight. That's not what I want to do. But I need to listen to my language tapes in order to become proficient and informed to the best of my abilities.

  Lance : What about the equal time agreement?

  Alvin : That doesn't apply to studies in education. The equal time boom box agreement doesn't apply in this case. That's for recreation.

  Lance : Oh, come on!

  Alvin : Hey, don't push my buttons, alright? You are not the boss here. I'm the boss. I hired you. And we have a lot of work to do. We could sit here arguing about language and music and blah, blah. But we've got a lot of work to do. A lot of lines to paint, and it's a very long road. I suggest you start the machine and keep it going.

  Lance : Alvin.

  Alvin : Yeah?

  Lance : You have your tool belt on backwards.

  [restarts the loud motor] 

  Alvin : Let's just enjoy the silence.

• Alvin : Gonna hit it in with your hand?

• [Lance is wanking. Alvin turns to his side] 

  Lance : Alvin! Alvin!

  [No response. Lance continues wanking] 

  Alvin : What?

  Lance : Never mind.

  [Turns to his side] 

• Alvin : Boy, somehow in your mind, you truly do perceive yourself as a gentleman, don't you?

• Lance : Lemme ask you question. Does it, like... Feel different having sex with a woman that's had a baby?

  Alvin : Mm-hmm. Yeah.