The Caretaker (2012) Poster

(I) (2012)

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3/10
Good story poorly filmed. And that awful music!!??
Jester22230 November 2020
An interesting story but badly scripted. Extremely unlikable characters. Confusing dialogue and actions.

The idea if a vampire virus isnt massively original (Stakeland etc) but the idea of caretakers looking out for each other was ok. Just not very well written. The Dr Vampire kept spouting pointless dialogue trying to sound deep and profound but ended up feeling forced and amusing. The girlfriend and boyfriend arguing constantly was beyond irritating. I just didnt care and it added nothing to the story. Daft.

No gore or FX to speak of. Cheap cgi face smoking in sun and rubber limbs.

Then last but certainly not least there is the music. Oh my god the music!! Ha ha. The music was so loud and inappropriately placed. Poorly mixed and amateur. Struggled to hear the actors over it and repeated itself over scenes where it was unnecessary. So distracting.

Avoid. Really no redeeming or watchable parts. I just wanted it to be over.
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5/10
YeGads the music!! Otherwise could have been a decent departure from the generic Vamp movie
jonnytheshirt22 January 2013
First off I have to say The Caretaker does well in that it had very much a different take on the over populated Vamp horror flicks we have. It certainly was not a 'by the numbers' flick and was certainly not predictable. The characters included were indeed not stereotypical and indeed there were some good elements seeded in the script. So fair play to them. With a bigger budget and a lot more polish who knows. However although there was a peppering of the odd bit of decent acting among our unlikely crew this was a awash in a protagonist so strong, sharp and dramatic in it's execution, so everywhere at every time that moments of little gems of the odd nice line from it's supporting cast faded into the background. And that protagonist was the Music. Maybe it was where I seen it but on my turn it down such overwrought angst in musical notes constantly. It was bordering on painful and really put this viewer through the wringer. So had potential - with better lighting, cinematography, colour palette, few less utterly weird character backgrounds (someone has issues somewhere) and better SFX this may have been decent. Essentially it is a B-movie with some moments I will remember however. Only watch if you're a die-hard Vamp fan and you may enjoy.
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4/10
B-movie trying
kosmasp22 June 2014
Some say "die trying", though that would be difficult if you're undead. Seriously though, this movie cannot be faulted for any lack on effort. It does try and for some (especially those with a soft spot for low budget movies), it is even able to achieve that goal. Not that anyone could mistake this for a classic mind you.

It still tries to imitate a couple of things that were very successful (like Blade to name but one movie this "borrowed" themes from). It has some blood and the acting is not as bad as one would/could expect. The story though is pretty simple and more than predictable. Still Kudos for trying to make a drama out of it and especially for the effort
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2/10
Absolute rubbish
netmange17 January 2013
Warning: Spoilers
The previous review must have been written by one of the film crew or someone who's paid to write a good review for an absolute piece of trash. Don't believe me? Sure. Go ahead and watch this piece of crap. The acting is awful. I've seen high school plays with similar standards of acting. Special effects are indeed special (if special means retarded). The make up crew probably made a trip to the local costumes store, bought a few fake plastic fangs, then traipsed down to Coles and bought a few cans of tomato puree. Then put a couple of splotches on the shirts they got from Salvos and voila! Instant gore. To add to the suspense, have the female lead stand in front of an old tree, play some elevator music with violins and have some poorly dressed stand-ins dash across the foreground to simulate fast moving "terrifying" vampires everywhere and you should have the audience shaking in their seats. This piece of work is a piece of rubbish. I wouldn't pay $0.10 to watch this. I'd much rather donate the money to the hobo sitting at the corner of the street.
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2/10
Worst than being bitten by a dozen vampires at once.
natashabowiepinky6 December 2013
On and on this film went, long past the point where I cared about it, until a sort of numbness crept in, where you really start to notice the world around you in your front room. Like: When was the last I hoovered the floor, or that wonky picture needs to be straightened. In the end, I just fidgeted around on my phone, as the lifeless (no pun intended there) characters met their respective fates and the ordeal was over. If the fact that I had more than one eye off the screen during the last 40 minutes means you ignore my review, then so help me... I don't give a hoot.

It's just a badly written, wretchedly edited, poorly acted piece of... dung which is NEVER scary, about from the implied idea that it was worth releasing in this condition. There is not one aspect of it which is worthwhile, and the only reason I haven't scored it less is when I compare it to some of the VERY worst horror movies I've seen, it's not QUITE as horrendous as that. This is hardly a recommendation, though. Steer well clear. 2/10
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6/10
Human drama in vampire movie form
grimmim10 August 2013
I have to admit that I was intrigued by the premise of this movie. Instead of having unrealistic characters, there is a random and quirky mix, and people don't become overnight heroes. The acting quality was decent without having anyone being a caricature. It moves a bit slower than the average vampire flick, because it's not an average vampire flick. So, for those expecting action-packed gore and lots of cool special effects, you may be disappointed. This movie visually catches the general feeling of forlorn hope; what would you do to survive, and when does it become too much to live with? it is beautiful yet desolate. It's not a perfect movie, but much better than I expected.

The piano soundtrack at certain points in the movie was absolutely haunting. I'm obsessed with figuring out how to play it now.
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9/10
A beautiful piece of Australian Cinema
itsmetif19 July 2012
While there is no denying that Vampires play a central role in this movie, I would challenge its pigeonholing as a genre film. Underneath the gore and fangs and horror is a simple story about humanity and survival. Each of the characters is unlikeable yet fragile, likable yet horrifying, showing us the complexity of human nature and human relationships. The actors and filmmakers did a wonderful job of bringing these characters to life and imbuing them with a sense of reality, as opposed to the sometimes stereotypical caricatures that often find their way into these type of films. On top of that the filmic style and colour palette used by the filmmakers gives the film a beautiful, rich visual feel.

One of my favourite Australian films to date, I hope it gets the recognition it deserves!
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6/10
A decent horror film....at last!
watrich-360-7966241 November 2013
Like many fans of the horror genre i have been disappointed on quite a few occasions by films that sound good but don't deliver when it comes to watching them (there is so much crap out there) i bought this DVD from a pound store then decided to read some of the reviews here first just in case i was wasting my time, some of the reviews sounded optimistic so i gave it a chance, and from the start i knew this was going to be better than most of the rubbish out there, the camera work was excellent with some beautiful scenery captured throughout, the story was interesting and the vampires just scary enough (although i would have preffered a couple more scenes with the characters fending off vampires) with good makeup effects, and the acting was pretty good for a low budget flick, all in all it was a decent horror film, hope to see more good horror stuff from this Director, he did a great job!
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7/10
Different angle for a vampire movie
preemptiveselfdefense24 September 2013
This is a tough one to rate. Basically gave it an extra point for making the attempt. I get people not taking to it but their reasoning is odd to me. Being an Australian movie some people just ain't gonna like it. Just the vibe and whatnot.

The music. Yup, that's an issue indeed. Being musically inclined myself I think I figured out the problem. Sort of. The score itself isn't bad, and seems like the right instruments are being used and played appropriately. If I had to to name the main issue I suppose it's that it sounds like they couldn't afford better. Just produced badly, the EQ is way too biased to the high range, and comes off grating. Then they mixed it in too loud. Kinda like a big Hollywood movie how the strings will blast you w/some patriotic thing like a laugh-track telling you when you're supposed to feel something. Though in this case I'm not sure they got the feeling they were hoping for. Often distracting and at best can be tuned out.

There are several good things though. The "main" vampire character that you follow in the beginning is great, I thought. He's got a unique appearance that works really well later on. Kinda like the old Salem's Lot (cool vampire, not-so-cool movie). Old-school creepy. Has character and I really watched it for him.

There's not a ton of hardcore vampire violence or big action sequences. To me that was fine. Didn't feel like they made it work because they couldn't afford to or something (maybe that's where the soundtrack budget went, or someone owed a relative a favor there). I thought it all came together quite well.

There's a core group of characters and though I found some irritating, it was okay for the most part. There was some dialogue introducing a couple of them that was fairly painful to listen to early on, but you might have one hand on the mute button cuz of the soundtrack anyway so no biggie.

I feel you could watch this movie w/out really thinking too much and it would be adequate. But there's more there if you bother to notice. There's none of that vampire romance stuff. Tom Cruise's pseudo- homosexual Lestat wouldn't fare well in this particular universe. I'm usually pretty lenient w/any movie that tries something new. For instance, I practically loathe Vin Diesel but I'm okay w/Pitch Black being around even if I don't like it (Cole Hauser doesn't do his movies any favors in my book either come to think of it) if only for using a true sci-fi premise. Maybe not the best one, but I couldn't match it to any movies I'd seen in the previous decade or two. Same thing w/the Caretaker. The true meaning of the title isn't kept secret necessarily, but it develops more impact and depth as the movie goes on. Someone gave some thought not only to the vampire genre but also a plausible idea for how humans adapt to all sorts of stuff we really shouldn't have to.

There are some sour notes throughout. Some character motivations are more complicated than they would first seem, but some are just dead ends so you end up getting annoyed at times. Overall though, I'd say watch it. Just keep in mind, these people have some issues. Many of which would need some serious therapy to dig out. One character's actions, more than others, can be... confusing. Just stick it out, I doubt you'll regret it. Am I going to watch this again any time soon? No, pretty sure I won't, but I know I will again. If you're a vampire fan though, you should watch. They went for creepy and disturbing (as the whole vampirism concept really is) without spoiling it by laying out all the "rules" and negating the mystique. The focus isn't on visual horror, more the inner torture that most of the characters are submitted to.

I imagine becoming a vampire would kinda blow personally. You wouldn't think so from most of the movies you see though. Nowadays you trade mortality, soul and a tan for eternal life, orgasms just from eating, permanent make over and a new black leather wardrobe. The vampires in this movie's world are tortured beings that aren't wild hunters so much as hosts for a hunger that destroys them. Without the doctor they wouldn't have been able gotten that across well but he sells it. Just wish I had a subtitle track for some of the dialogue. Sound editor can just go ahead and go deaf though, might even help.
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6/10
Started REALLY BAD then I started liking it
smileybug-356-7830528 September 2013
Warning: Spoilers
I don't know what to say about this weird vampire movie. I have to say that for the first 2/3 of it I kept thinking this has to be one of the worst movies, especially vampire movies ever made. Somehow though, I still kept watching and I am glad I did. I might have given it a higher rating if 3 things were better. First the acting is horrendous. None of these people can act, another reviewer mentioned it reminding him of high school acting in a play. There were parts that were down right campy, (possibly intentional?), when the vampires would attack each other, or "fight" for territory, just dumb. Second the script was really overly dramatic in parts, people saying things that are just not real dialog, etc. Felt like someone very inexperienced wrote the script. Trying to make the movie better by creating all these stupid lines. The constant poetic talk that the main vampire starts doing in the last half of the movie, what is that about?? OK, and last, the music is just done bad. The songs/score are fine, but the volume pumps up at times to the point you have to turn it down, and it isn't even necessarily in a part where you would expect to have loud and dramatic music. Here are the things I liked about it. I liked the story, instead of the usual humans running around trying to keep from being killed/turned by vampires, you have this whole other concept where the vampire looks out for the humans during the night, if they watch out for him during the day. Interesting and nothing I have seen done before. The location was nicely done with the landscape colors being so vivid, and the sky going from day to night. The ending was good, even the acting seemed to improve in the last few scenes. I am thinking if this movie had a bigger budget with better actors and a better script, this might be really great.
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