Sherlock (TV Series)

A Scandal in Belgravia (2012)

Rupert Graves: DI Lestrade

Quotes 

• Sherlock Holmes : [on the phone]  Lestrade? We've had a break-in at Baker Street. Send your least irritating officers and an ambulance. Oh, no, no, no, no, we're fine. No, it's the, uh, it's the burglar, he's got himself rather badly injured.

  [Neilson, bound and gagged, but otherwise unharmed, looks up in confusion] 

  Sherlock Holmes : Oh, a few broken ribs, fractured skull, suspected punctured lung.

  [pause] 

  Sherlock Holmes : He fell out of a window.

  [cut to the first floor of Baker Street, where John is tending Mrs. Hudon's wounds] 

  Mrs. Hudson : Oh! It stings...

  [a body falls past the window, landing with a crash] 

  Mrs. Hudson : Oh, that was right on my bins.

  [Cut to a later street scene, as the ambulance pulls away] 

  DI Lestrade : And exactly how many times did he fall out of the window?

  Sherlock Holmes : It's all a bit of a blur, Detective Inspector. I lost count.

• Sherlock Holmes : I see you've got a new boyfriend, Molly, and you're serious about him.

  Molly Hooper : What? Sorry, what?

  Sherlock Holmes : In fact, you're seeing him this very night and giving him a gift.

  Dr. John Watson : Take a day off.

  Lestrade : Shut up and have a drink.

  Sherlock Holmes : Oh, come on, surely you've all seen the present at top of the bag. Perfectly wrapped with a bow. All the others are slap-dash at best. It's for someone special, then. The shade of red echoes her lipstick, either an unconscious association or one that she's deliberately trying to encourage. Either way, Miss Hooper has love on her mind. The fact that she's serious about him is clear from the fact that she's giving him a gift at all. That always suggests long-term hopes, however forlorn, and that she's seeing him tonight is evident from her make-up and what she's wearing. Obviously trying to compensate for the size of her mouth and breasts...

  [voice trails off as he opens the tag: "Dearest Sherlock Love Molly xxx"] 

  Molly Hooper : [brutally embarrassed]  You always say such horrible things. Every time. Always. Always...

  Sherlock Holmes : [turns to leave but turns back]  I am sorry. Forgive me.

  [John looks up, completely surprised at hearing an apology from Sherlock] 

  Sherlock Holmes : Merry Christmas, Molly Hooper.

  [Sherlock kisses her cheek. Suddenly, Sherlock's text message tone goes off, which Irene Adler earlier changed to the sound of a woman gasping in ecstasy] 

  Molly Hooper : Oh, No! That wasn't... I didn't...

  Sherlock Holmes : No, it was me.

  Lestrade : My God, really?

  Molly Hooper : What?

  Sherlock Holmes : My *phone*.