Office Christmas Party (2016)
T.J. Miller: Clay Vanstone
Photos
Quotes
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Clay Vanstone : I gotta tell you, I was always like, "Tracey, this doesn't make any sense," and she was like, "Words, words, words and some numbers." But she did it.
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Carol Vanstone : All right, if by some miracle you can close Walter Davis and his 14 million dollar account, your jobs are safe.
Clay Vanstone : Done! And you're going to look so stupid!
Carol Vanstone : [Begins walking out of the door] Then we'll finally have something in common!
Clay Vanstone : [the door shuts] Goddammit, she's so mean!
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Clay Vanstone : Shut the fuck door!
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Clay Vanstone : Vin Diesel ain't got shit on me!
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Clay Vanstone : Hey, God. I know I haven't asked for a lot in this life. Granted, I was born rich... and white... and a man... and straight. Well, except for that one time in Vegas, but that was Vegas.
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Clay Vanstone : Nobody is losing their jobs!
Josh Parker : Yeah.
Clay Vanstone : That is a Josh and Clay Christmas promise.
Jeremy : Your promises are dog shit!
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Clay Vanstone : [picks up a hair trimmer] Hey, what about this for Alan from legal?
Josh Parker : Well, Alan's bald.
Clay Vanstone : [puts the trimmer down] It's so hard to shop for the bald. Who are they? What do they want?
Josh Parker : Hair.
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Carol Vanstone : [to Clay, who is driving Trina's car] Pull over, you fucking idiot!
Josh Parker : [to Carol as he drives Mary's mini-van] Or... the nice, supportive version.
Carol Vanstone : [to Clay] Pull over! Fucking idiot!
Clay Vanstone : No!
Carol Vanstone : [to Trina] Hey, tell him to pull over, lady!
Trina : [to Carol] Look!
[puts her gun to Clay's right temple]
Trina : Pull over!
[puts her gun under Clay's chin]
Trina : Pull over!
[puts her gun to Clay's forehead]
Trina : Pull over! It doesn't work!
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Clay Vanstone : [looks around as he, Trina, Savannah, and Alexei enter The Red Star] Ooh, there's a car on fire. Did the Bears win?
