- Blair Waldorf: It's no use to deny the past. Chuck is a part of me. He'll always be. It just hurts so much.
- Dorota Kishlovsky: In Poland, we have a saying, "Love is like head wound." It make you dizzy, you think you die, but you recover. Usually.
- Dan Humphrey: [to Jenny] Hey, Jenny! Jenny! Please tell me what you're doing here, starting with "Dad knows", and ending with "these drinks are not for me."
- Jenny Humphrey: Since I haven't actually talked to Dad today, no. But these drinks are for Nate and Chuck.
- Dan Humphrey: What are you doing with Nate and Chuck?
- Jenny Humphrey: Well, Nate's my friend, and Chuck's totally harmless unless this place runs out of ice.
- Chuck Bass: I haven't read any posts on Gossip Girl yet. I guess my ban works in the provinces.
- Blair Waldorf: I knew it. I knew you'd fatwa'd me.
- Chuck Bass: And I knew you couldn't break it.
- Blair Waldorf: You're wrong. I could have.
- Chuck Bass: Then why didn't you?
- Blair Waldorf: Because... I suddenly realized it. The way to get over you, isn't by hooking up with some random guy or pretending like we didn't happen. You and I loved each other. And then you broke my heart. I've been doing everything possible not to face that fact. I'm gonna kiss somebody someday, and when I do, it'll be for me. Good-bye, Chuck.
- [last lines]
- Gossip Girl: On the Upper East Side, sometimes the wrong prescription is just what the doctor orders. XOXO,Gossip Girl.
- Blair Waldorf: Did you send the invitations by carrier pigeon? I-is the elevator broken? A meteor headed for earth?
- [to Dorota]
- Blair Waldorf: You were against this from the start. What did you do?
- Chuck Bass: [at Nate's place, elevator bell dings, and, a bit inebriated, Chuck enters with two lady friends in tow] There is an outlet by the bed, and I will be in in a minute.
- [the girls giggle as they head for the bedroom]
- Jenny Humphrey: You look like hell.
- Chuck Bass: Small price to pay for feeling like heaven. Where's Archibald? Don't tell me you two *finally* closed the deal?
- Jenny Humphrey: I have no idea what you're talking about, Chuck.
- Chuck Bass: Please, you've been panting at his loafers ever since Serena went MIA with Carter. Is it as you always imagined?
- [takes a sniff of the shirt she slept in]
- Chuck Bass: Late night... you two engaged
- [swings racquet]
- Chuck Bass: in a sweaty Wii duel? Your bodies touch... he looks at you like he's never looked at you...
- Jenny Humphrey: Ugh, you're an ass, Chuck. Besides, Serena's back.
- Chuck Bass: Oh, maybe now you'd actually have a chance. Don't worry, the odds of me actually remembering this conversation are slim.
- Jenny Humphrey: [runs after him] Wait, what do you mean I'll stand a chance now?
- Chuck Bass: Archibald"s never gonna cross the line. He's a good guy. He'd cling to Serena's golden locks... until she pushes him away.
- Jenny Humphrey: Why would she do that? I mean, he's always been patient and understanding.
- Chuck Bass: You and I know that... but if she were to think Nate had in fact betrayed her, she would drive him into your waiting arms in no time.
- Jenny Humphrey: Why are you telling me all this?
- Chuck Bass: Because...
- [backs into the room where his two lady friends await]
- Chuck Bass: I want my friend back. This would be done easier with Serena out of the picture. Now all you need is something to make her suspicious.
- [closes the doors, and from inside, the girls laugh]
- Dan Humphrey: [to Jenny, who instantly sniffed out that Willa has a thing for him] Wait a second. Why do you go from zero to blackmail in sixty seconds?
- Jenny Humphrey: [on phone] So, what's step two?
- Chuck Bass: Get him drunk. Take advantage of him. Do women just not get this?
- Jenny Humphrey: Chuck, he's not gonna go drinking with me. He made me call my Dad when I slept over.
- Chuck Bass: [that low baritone voice:] Be here. Six o'clock sharp. And look like someone who doesn't even have a father.
- Blair Waldorf: You twisted, manipulative psychopath! How could you!
- Chuck Bass: You're going to have to be a tad more specific. It's been a busy few days.