- Brett Erlich: Let's put out a show where we give out awards that we call the Year-Endies.
- Ellen Fox: Great idea Brett! We'll praise and pan 2009 while you sit down on your rear endies. Ha ha you fat asses.
- Brett Erlich: A year of box office power!
- Ellen Fox: Crammed into just one half hour.
- Brett Erlich: With no acceptance speeches to bear...
- Ellen Fox: Cause nobody cares.
- Ellen Fox: Unfortunately, Alonso couldn't be here today, so we accept, on his behalf, this gold Web-Cam Award.
- Alonso Duralde: [Walks on camera] Uh, actually, I'm here.
- Brett Erlich: Whoa, you don't live in an Internet.
- Ellen Fox: Say a few words, please.
- [Hands him the award]
- Alonso Duralde: Thanks, I've attended so many Year Endies parties over the years, I'm just amazed I'm actually here. I want to thank all the movies that sucked this year for giving me something to talk about. Oh, and the good ones too.