- [VP Hyde grills Jake about his article in the school paper]
- VP Jason Hyde: You see the school paper this morning, Mr. Retton?
- Jake Retton: Took a gander.
- VP Jason Hyde: Oh, there's a column on the new gym, a review of the spring musical, then this, "Doping on the Field, the illicit drugs that drive our athletes" by Jake Retton. Explain to mew why you ran that.
- Jake Retton: I didn't run it. I wrote it. The edior ran it.
- VP Jason Hyde: You snuck it in. Don't deny it.
- Jake Retton: Suppose you let me off with a warning.
- VP Jason Hyde: Suppose I suspend you.
- Jake Retton: Suppose I pen a piece about a crooked VP with a kiddy's pull string where his spine should be.
- Kevin: I look like a skeleton that fell face-first into a bucket of paint -- which is a definite improvement.