Vampires (2010) Poster

(2010)

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7/10
Man Bites Vampire!
Coventry25 April 2010
The greatest cult movie that my country ever brought forward is inarguably "Man Bites Dog", about a group of journalists following around a serial killer who openly talks about his occupation and proudly illustrates his modus operandi in front of the camera. Now, nearly twenty years later, Belgium has another false/pseudo documentary ready with "Vampires", although I doubt this one will become as big and successful. Too bad actually, because "Vampires" is a fresh, inventive and pleasantly deranged movie with an intelligent script and devoted acting performances by the ensemble cast. The members of a TV crew get the assignment of following around a family of vampires and shoot a documentary about their life, habits and characteristics. The crew receives a warm welcome from patriarch Georges, his wife Bertha and their two children Samson and Grace. The family lives in the French- speaking part of Belgium, where life is beautiful and easy-going thanks to the country's protective and all-covering social system. They feed on illegal immigrants and former prostitutes referred to as "Meat" and attend gatherings with other vampires in the same district. The vampires have their share of problems as well, like recurring arguments with the couple living in the basement (vampires without children haven't got the right to purchase a house), the teenage daughter Grace wishes to be human and commits suicide all the time even though she's immortal and the partying son Samson has been caught having sex with the wife of the district vampire leader. Because of this tremendous offense Georges and his family are exiled to Canada, where a vampire's life is a lot less cheerful. The film's biggest trump is the clever and witty screenplay, co-written director Vincent Lannoo, that is chock-full of funny little gags, subtle society criticism and honorable references towards film and literature classics. There's not a dull moment in the script and the pacing is fast and rhythmic enough to keep you entertained throughout. This isn't really a horror movie, but still there are a handful of bloody massacres and nasty rituals illustrated on screen, basically to emphasize that the main characters are and remain, in fact, monsters. The performances are terrific. Like with "Man Bites Dog", I presume Belgians feel very comfortable with talking straight into the camera and act completely natural about the most eccentric and dubious subject matter. "Vampires" is a creative and replenishing comedy that makes me proud to be Belgian – especially since we only make the international news because of our political crisis and mass murderers – and I hope Vincent Lannoo & C° will be able to expand the success beyond Belgian boundaries as well.
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5/10
not funny and no red stuff
trashgang29 March 2012
Finally I picked this flick up after seeing it a few times in the shops. Somewhere I had my doubts about it. I have seen and enjoyed "C'est arrivé près de chez vous" (1992) and never thought we would have another faut documentary coming out of Belgium. But 20 years later it finally did.

Starting off rather brutal with a few killings I thought, hell, this is going to be good but for me it failed on the bloody part. The only gore involved is when they are watching a flick called 'Midnight Movie'. I reviewed it 2 years ago. The thing that didn't work for me was that they were talking a lot and it went on and on. Some did see some humour in that part but I never laughed it out loud.

I can't say anything negative about the acting because that was believable but for a flick about vampires there isn't that much of biting and sucking. Maybe the pink coffin was a bit funny but overall it was a typical flick made by French talking people. Blah blah blah.

I guess Vincent, the director, did watch True Blood about how vampires rule the earth and about their laws and bosses. Even as True Blood is becoming ridiculous with the Elves involved Vampires couldn't tip on True Blood.

Nice effort and maybe the French talking people will have a laughter but for me personally no smile on my face. Once you have seen it I guess you will never watch it again.

Gore 1/5 Nudity 0/5 Effects 0/5 Story 2/5 Comedy 0,5/5
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7/10
Vampire situation comedy
reallyevilboy15 September 2014
Warning: Spoilers
First of all, for all of those who peruse the vast bulk of horror movies out there wanting blood, gore and fright you wont get any out of this one. This is more of a situation comedy, it's a odd situation and it's kind of funny.

Right from the get go I was surprised by this movie. The film crew were invited to spend time and "Get to know" a vampire family. The first few attempts did not work out too well because within seconds they were eaten. It's surprising they kept giving it a go.

Even though I was not overjoyed with this movie, it was interesting, it was slightly funny and the characters/actors had their charm. It was worth the watch but will never make my top 20.
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8/10
best vampire satire ever
lililandrum148829 June 2014
This was not your typical played out blood sucker flick.This is so refreshing after a slew of films that rely on special effects or soft core to sell tickets,i caught this gem on Netflix instant .This explained the evolution of vampires from the impaler to modern day.In this tongue in cheek hilarious mock documentary take on things rarely addressed in this genre.A series of well thought out interviews explore the family dynamics of teen angst,sibling rivalry,etiquette,dating,police,education,immigration ,infedelity,first love," death day" celebrations,homelessness,and integration into human society as well as the job force and political Snafu's.As well as the hideousness of the color pink.
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8/10
Different... And great!... But different...
minimusdecimus7 January 2012
I find myself, sometimes, strongly disagreeing with other viewer's opinions about a movie or another. I guess this is the case here too, since I was amazed with the subtle irony of the screenplay and the great acting in Vampires. It fulfills the promises HBO's True Blood made in the beginning (and after that fell into ridiculous). A 10/10 start and then some pretty shallow following seasons – nothing to make me watch it anymore, except for one episode here and there, in the nights when I really don't have anything better to do.

This movie, by comparison, brings something fresh and interesting (and holds it throughout, to the end) in the whole vampire films industry, with its dull mass production and only few products that really shine and stand out. I'm not sure - perhaps it's a bit hard to 'get it, because in order to thoroughly enjoy it, one must be familiar with the myths and taboos AND the reality regarding the two main locations in the movie – Belgium and Canada. The second requirement would be to watch it not expecting some wild action or romance fantasy movie, but a very reality-based review of the social and personal issues of the regular guy/family.

If I were to describe it by comparing to other movies that made an impression on me in the same way, this vampire movie is kind of what Last Night (1998, Canada) means for the 'end of days' genre, 2046 (2004, Hong Kong) for the 'hard to find your soul mate' genre, The Mirror (1975, Soviet Union) for 'my life as I remember it' genre, The Fountain (2006, USA) for 'how we cope with the loss' genre and so on. OK, I think I may have made up those genres, but you get the idea... I'm talking about an unexpected point of view, intelligent, deep, making a point with great sense of humour (in Vampires) – all things that set it apart from the crowd.
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8/10
Great Idea and Generally Well Done
drumax-759-41782816 August 2012
Warning: Spoilers
I liked this movie a lot. I generally do not like fake documentaries and the vampire has been so over used its hard to think something worth watching could still be made but combine fake documentary WITH Vampires...throw in a lot of dry, dark humor and you seem to get a winning combination.

This movie takes the form of a documentary about a community of real vampires. After the first few attempts to shoot the documentary end in the death of the camera crew by vampires who, although they agree to be filmed, cant help but kill them. They eventually find a vampire family able to control themselves enough to allow the human camera men to film them.

We get a peek into the family, we get to know their lodgers (a vampire couple), their daughter who want to be like a human, their human slave whom they feed on. We get to know this particular vampire community, headed by an elder vampire forever a young boy, and its rules.

It is these rules and a son who breaks them that get the family expelled from their community and they end up in Canada where they find a new community with very different rules and a new life they must get used to.

In the end, the movie is entertaining, witty, humorous, and dark. I recommend it. It is subtitled but very much worth the read.
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8/10
My Review Of "Vampires"
ASouthernHorrorFan16 July 2013
I was going through the Sundance on Demand list and came across a title that just sang to me. It was "Vampires" so how could I not want to see it. It is a Belgian Film done in a serious documentary style that is reminiscent of the stuff you see on CurrentTV.

A film crew gets the green light to follow a family of vampires in Belgian's uber-exclusive Vamp community. After several attempts that ended with the crew being eaten a third crew manages to find a family with enough self control to allow the film to get made. The family is dysfunctional as hell, the politics of vampire society are complex and sensitive, and we are nothing but meat.

This film is subtitled and moves pretty fast so you have to really pay attention unless your fluent in Belgian and French. The documentary still was subdued but kept a very intense feeling of unease as you followed this family along during the night shot only premise. These vampires do not go in the daylight. They don't even get up till the sun goes down. Anyway from the beginning you can almost feel the nervousness of the film crew that have to be there watching this family eat their meat (us).

There are so many dynamics to this film that it keeps you interested the entire time as you deal with the father's cold restrictive beliefs, the mother's complete disregard for her families volatile state as she comes off as a lunatic barely coherent only able to express disgust for her daughter and contempt for her husband. The son is unruly, disruptive and pretty much disrespectful of vampire code. The daughter hates everything about being a vampire and wants to be human. She even goes so far as to sleep in a girly pink coffin with her human boyfriend.

This documentary is one of the best displays of vampire lore I have seen in a long time. The culture and relationships the vampires have with each other are extreme to say the least and they completely mirror the behavior of any suburban or contemporary social structure. The film is really good at paralleling the emotional numbness of a old world set of values where everything is enforced based on codes and clan law which resemble the more strict religious groups around the world that stay closed off from mainstream society. Later the polar system to this way of life is visible when the family is exiled to Canada for a violation to live among the vampire community. There everything is modern and the vampire community is assimilated into the human world.

I really enjoyed watching this film and after about 30 minutes you become really invested in the family emotionally. You forget it is fictional and start believing that it is a real documentary following real people.
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10/10
Absolutely and totally brilliant
seoirseuiduic4 July 2014
Belgium has a long tradition of faut documentary, film noir and sarcasm and this movie does not disappoint. If you are looking for a bloody and gory Hollywood movie stay far away from it, if you're looking for great dialogues in French, Flemish and German (I must admit the movie is better if you can understand those three languages Nd get the clever jokes and sarcastic comments), excellent cinematography, a good storyline and no special effects than this is it. Movies just like movies should be made. Focusing on the acting and not on the special effects. If you like Hollywood horror ignore it, if you are a fan of Christopher Lee and Boris Karloff you'll love it.
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