- Jack Halford: How did you get on? Enjoy yourself with Jacinta?
- Gerry Standing: No, not really. I don't fancy her.
- Det Supt Sandra Pullman: I'm sure she'll get over it.
- Gerry Standing: No, you don't understand. I don't fancy her - it's weird.
- Det Supt Sandra Pullman: Maybe you're finally emerging from puberty.
- Brian Lane: [drunk on fumes] Would you pass me my crocodile. It's time to eat my cheese and pantaloons.
- [first lines]
- TV Reporter: [on TV] After hearing the guilty verdict, Deputy Assistant Commissioner Robert Strickland gave this reaction.
- D A C Strickland: It is hard to comprehend how a detective of McAdam's rank and experience could have deceived his fellow officers for so long.
- Gerry Standing: 'Cause you were in charge of him, you pillock!
- D A C Strickland: We will now undertake a full and thorough review of all the major investigations led by DCI Mcadam during the last fifteen years.
- Brian Lane: Ouch.
- Jack Halford: Fifteen years.
- Gerry Standing: Pity the poor bastards who've got to sort that lot out.
- Det Supt Sandra Pullman: [holding a thick file] Yes, pity.
- Brian Lane: But it's nothing to do with us; those are all closed cases.
- Det Supt Sandra Pullman: All except this one.
- Gerry Standing: No way!
- Det Supt Sandra Pullman: You don't want to do it?
- Jack Halford: No.
- Det Supt Sandra Pullman: Nineteen ninety-eight, a twenty-six-year-old named Graham Thompson drowned in a vat of beer. Felspar's Brewery, Hoxton - as in the still functioning, still making beer Felspar's.
- [pause]
- Det Supt Sandra Pullman: OK. Fair enough.
- Brian Lane: Felspar's. I must have drunk gallons of the stuff.
- Gerry Standing: We could have a *little* look.
- Jack Halford: Wouldn't hurt.
- Gerry Standing: The brewery paid for most of this, didn't it?
- Jacinta Felspar: I got this the hard way: I married someone.
- Gerry Standing: Tell me about it.
- [last lines]
- Gerry Standing: I told you there was something weird going on.
- Det Supt Sandra Pullman: Seeing as you were so right, you can so write this one up. Good night.
- Jack Halford: Good night.
- Brian Lane: Night.
- Gerry Standing: Uh, good night.
- [opens a bottle of Far-Reaching Bitter]
- Gerry Standing: Last one. What a shame.