The Angry Video Game Nerd (TV Series)

The Wizard and Super Mario Bros 3 (2008)

James Rolfe: The Angry Video Game Nerd, Demon, Super Mecha Death Christ

Quotes 

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : [on Fred Savage]  Who the hell are you? Go back to the freakin' Wonder Years, you piece of shit.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : The power of Super Mecha Death Christ compels you!

  Super Mecha Death Christ : [bursts in]  Fuckers! Fuckers!

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : Yeah, Super Mecha Death Christ 2,000 B.C. Version 4.0 Beta, bitch.

  Super Mecha Death Christ : Fuckers!

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : Holy shit!

  Super Mecha Death Christ : [zaps him]  Watch your fucking language!

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : We annihilated him.

  Super Mecha Death Christ : Yes we did!

  [sees the Nerd wearing NES accessories as a costume] 

  Super Mecha Death Christ : What the fuck is that shit?

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : Oh, all this shit? I'll tell you all about it.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : This part doesn't fuck around! It's like, you got to the end, you dare to play, welcome to Hell! That's what it looks like... all this fire and skulls, it looks like Hell. There's sorta like a heart shape around it. Yeah, a heart around Hell. Does that mean this game loves Hell? This game worships the devil! Oh my God! Of course it does! Why are there so many inverted crosses? What's the H stand for? Hell? How about the part with the tarot cards? The N? Necronomicon? The P must be possession or pentagram! Yeah, the pentagram makes an appearance everywhere! It's no doubt that the seven sons of Bowser represent the seven deadly sins. You kneel before Satan on the block, and after six seconds, you fall through; there's six arrows on the possession meter, and to reach the goal you go in the sixth door. That's 666! Everywhere you look, it's the number of the beast! In the Wizard, the game's introduction is basically the Gates of Hell opening! Yeah, Video Armaggedon! The Devil watches you throughout the game. The clouds have eyes, the hills have eyes... yeah, literally, the hills have eyes. Thank heavens, and we know there's no need to thank Heaven unless there's the presence of Hell! There's 8 worlds, in the eighth world, there's 5 spaces you can stand on where giant hands take you down to your doom, there's 12 tanks you gotta jump on before the goal, and it takes 12 jumps to get Bowser to jump down the hole. The eighth letter of the alphabet is H, 5 = E, 12 = L, what's that spell? Hell! And what's it sound like when you play the game backwards? This game's a product of the fucking devil, and none of the other Mario games are like that, so I don't know why it's only this one. So, in conclusion, all I can say is that other than being the total epitome of evil, Super Mario Bros. 3 is a good game... so good that it's a sin!

• Demon : Your mother sucks cocks in hell.

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : What the fuck did you just say?

  Demon : I said, your mother sucks cocks in *hell!*

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : Ah! Go back to hell, you evil motherfucker!

• [repeated line] 

  Super Mecha Death Christ : Fuckers!