- Darlene Conner: [to Becky] How did we both wind up raising kids alone?
- Becky Conner-Healy: I'm an alcoholic and you married a loser.
- Harris Conner-Healy: [to Darlene] Sit down, Crossroads with Britney Spears is on. It's about her having sex for the first time. It's the worst movie ever made. We have to watch it.