Doctor Who (TV Series)

Partners in Crime (2008)

Sarah Lancashire: Miss Foster

Photos 

Quotes 

• [mouthing words silently and exaggeratedly] 

  The Doctor : Donna?

  Donna Noble : Doc-tor!

  The Doctor : Wh - what - w - what?

  Donna Noble : Oh! My! *God*!

  The Doctor : How?

  Donna Noble : [pointing at her face with both hands]  It's me!

  The Doctor : [nodding, gesturing to eyes, then Donna]  Yeah, I can see that.

  Donna Noble : [pointing to where she's standing, then two thumbs up]  Oh, this... is... *brilliant*!

  The Doctor : [pointing thrice at Donna]  W - wha - what the hell are *you* *doing* *there*?

  Donna Noble : [pointing to eyes, then at The Doctor]  I... was looking... for... you!

  The Doctor : [points at self questioningly]  What for?

  Donna Noble : [miming reading the paper]  Read it...

  Donna Noble : [typing fingers in the air]  ... on the Internet...

  Donna Noble : [wiggling fingers around mouth]  ... so weird...

  Donna Noble : [walking fingers]  ... crept along...

  Donna Noble : [thumb into room, hand-as-mouth]  ... heard them talking...

  Donna Noble : [ducks down, comes back up, points]  ... looked, ah! *You*!

  The Doctor : [imperceptibly nods] 

  Donna Noble : [thumbs back at Miss Foster, looks, freezes]  Th...

  [Miss Foster has stopped talking and is staring at Donna. Miss Foster turns and looks right at The Doctor. The Doctor turns to see Miss Foster] 

  Miss Foster : [aloud]  Are we interrupting you?

• Miss Foster : Well, at last.

  Donna Noble : Hello.

  The Doctor : Nice to meet you! I'm the Doctor.

  Donna Noble : And I'm Donna.

  Miss Foster : Partners in crime. And evidently of other world origin, judging by your sonic technology.

  The Doctor : [feels through his pockets and finds Miss Foster's sonic pen]  Oh, yes! I've still got your sonic pen! Nice! I like it, sleek. It's definitely sleek.

  Donna Noble : Oh, it's definitely sleek.

  The Doctor : Yes, and if you were to sign your real name. That would be...

  Miss Foster : Matron Cofelia, of the Five-Straighten, Classabindi Nursery Fleet, Intergalactic Class.

  The Doctor : And that is using humans as surrogates.

  Miss Foster : I've been employed by the Adiposian First Family to foster a new generation after their breeding planet was lost.

  The Doctor : What do you mean, "lost"? How do you lose a planet?

  Miss Foster : Oh politics are none of my concern. I'm just here to take care of the children on behalf of the parents.

  Donna Noble : Like an outer space supernanny?

  Miss Foster : Yes, if you like!

  Donna Noble : So, so those little things, they're made out of fat. But that woman, Stacey Campbell, there was nothing left of her.

  Miss Foster : Well, in a crisis, the Adipose can convert bone and hair and internal organs. Makes them a little bit sick, the poor things.

  Donna Noble : What about poor Stacey?

  The Doctor : Seeding a Level 5 planet is against galactic laws.

  Miss Foster : [turns to the Doctor]  Are you threatening me?

  The Doctor : I'm trying to help you, Matron. This is your one chance, because if you don't call this off, then I'll have to stop you.

  Miss Foster : Then how do you think you can stop all of this?

  [her bodyguards point their machine guns at the Doctor and Donna] 

  The Doctor : Hold on! Hold on! One more thing, before dying! Do you know what happens when you hold two identical sonic devices against each other?

  [He takes out his own sonic screwdriver] 

  Miss Foster : No.

  The Doctor : Nor me! Let's find out!

  [he jams the two sonic screwdrivers together and activates both, emitting a loud, deafening pulsing sound that also shakes the room such so that it shatters a window] 

• Miss Foster : [with Penny tied to a chair]  You know I'm surprised you never asked about my name; I chose it well.

  [leans forward] 

  Miss Foster : Foster... as in Foster Mother. And these

  [reaches into a drawer and takes out a baby alien; setting it on her desk] 

  Miss Foster : are my children.

  Penny Carter : [disturbed; and a bit frightened]  Your kidding me. What the hell is that?

  Miss Foster : An Adipose. It's called an Adipose.

  [smiling proudly] 

  Miss Foster : Made out of living fat.

• Penny Carter : You can't tie me up! What sort of a country do you think this is?

  Miss Foster : Oh it's a beautifully fat country. And believe me I've come a long way to find obesity on this scale.

• Miss Foster : [at a press conference about the ADIPOSE pills]  ADIPOSE Industries, the 21st Century way to lose weight. No exercise, no diet, no pain. Just lifelong freedom from fat, the Holy Grail of the modern age.

  [holds up one of the pills in her fingers] 

  Miss Foster : And here it is. You just take one capsule, one capsule once a day for three weeks, and the fat, as they say...

  Presentation announcer : The fat just walks away!

  Penny Carter : Excuse me, Miss Foster? If I could? I'm Penny Carter, science correspondant for the Observer. There are a thousand diet pills on the market, a thousand condiments with which to lose money. How do we know that the fat isn't going straight into your bank account?

  Miss Foster : Oh, Penny. If cynicism burnt up calories, we'd all be a cynic race. But if you want the science...

  [takes off her glasses] 

  Miss Foster : ... I'd oblige.

• Penny Carter : I've been through the records, Foster, and all of your results have been faked - there's something about those pills you're not telling us!

  Miss Foster : Oh I think I'll be conducting this interview, Penny.

• [after spending all day hiding in a toilet stall, Donna emerges, but then gets a call from her mother, and hides back in the stall] 

  Donna Noble : Not now!

  Sylvia Noble : I need the car. Where are you?

  Donna Noble : [improvising, and whispering]  The car went missing!

  Sylvia Noble : Why are you whispering?

  Donna Noble : I'm in church.

  Sylvia Noble : What would you do in church?

  Donna Noble : I'm praying.

  Sylvia Noble : [scoffs]  A bit late for that, I imagine.

  Wilfred Mott : What's she in church for?

  Sylvia Noble : Hush, you! Go up the hill.

  [to Donna] 

  Sylvia Noble : Well, I need the car. I'm going out with Suzette Chambers. She's asked all the Wednesday girls. Apparently she's been on those ADIPOSE pills. She says she looks marvelous.

  [Donna hangs up because Miss Foster and her bodyguards have burst into the bathroom and are looking for her] 

  Miss Foster : We know you're in here. So let's make this nice and easy and show yourself.

  [Donna puts her feet up to hide herself] 

  Miss Foster : I'm waiting. I warn you, I'm not a patient woman, so out you come!

  [nothing] 

  Miss Foster : Right, we'll do it the hard way.

  [to her bodyguards] 

  Miss Foster : Get her!

  1st Foster Guard : [kicks open each stall's door. He does this four times. On the fifth door, he bursts down the door to reveal Penny Carter] 

  Miss Foster : [lowers her glasses]  There you are.

  [takes Penny into custody] 

  Penny Carter : I've been through the records, Foster, and all of your results have been faked! There's something about those pills that you're not telling us!

  Miss Foster : Oh, I think I'll be conducting this interview, Penny.

  [Donna looks on as Miss Foster and her bodyguards take Penny away]