- The crew gathers to show their support for Franco as he steps into the ring. Sean reveals his shady financial scheme and things quickly turn from bad to worse when an act of good will backfires on the crew.
- Needles and Lou get Franco ready for his fight. Tommy asks Lou how things are going with Candy. But he answers too quickly and Tommy smells a lie. He tells him about the go slow plan. Tommy is suspicious. They compare whose sins are greater, former hooker Candy's or Tommy for his no strings deal with Sheila and Janet. Lou asks Tommy to let him enjoy the illusion for as long as it lasts.
At the fight, Shawn, Tommy, Damian, Mike and Feinberg admire Franco's friend Carla. Tommy tells Shawn his daughter has him whipped. Colleen joins them and the second Carla walks away Colleen announces Carla is gay. She describes the secret lesbian handshake. Shawn asks Colleen how she'd know and her pause seems to answer. One more round of sex experience for Tommy's daughter. She sends Shawn away for her diet soda.
Ringside, Needles reminds Franco that there are innocent children dying around the world and Sean has cancer -- use it as fighting fire. Carla cheers him on using suspiciously colorful man language. Colleen rests her case.
The fight begins. Franco appears to be dominating, and after not much time, his opponent goes down. Shawn comes back with Colleen's soda. She's not thirsty.
In the hospital, an orderly checks on Sean. He wants a semen sample. Sean is alarmed. Then the nurse breaks out a boom box and strips. Terence and their mom bust up laughing at the world's worst male stripper. The guys all come in, mercifully ending the show.
They wanted to show how glad they are that he's feeling better in their typical homoerotic fashion, Lou says. He tells Sean they're donating their winnings from Franco's fight to his hospital bill: $5,000. They figure his mom and brother could use the relief, but they pipe up that they're not paying for anything. In a nice little stream of consciousness Sean explains he's paying for most of it by skimming off the top of the cash from the bar and they've got him on some drugs that are making him feel a lot better.
The guys pause. Tommy asks him to repeat that. Sean asks how dumb can they be, he was always volunteering to count the money and when was the last time they saw him open a book? They laugh nervously. He says they'd have done the same thing, he thought he was going to die. Franco says it's cool, then they take turns choking him. Tommy pulls them off saying desperate times and all, they'll have to forgive and forget. And they're going to need their check back. Sean says he's still a little short, so he's keeping it.
Out in the hall, they look at his bill. They're angry at him at first and then realize it's up to them to cover the rest of it. Mike suggests his band play a charity event at the bar.
Walking down the hall, Tommy runs into the cancer kid he hung out with last time. The kid wants to see the fire trucks and Tommy says they'll bring one by.
Tommy, Sheila and Damian go to dinner. Damian says he's going to move in with Mike and the guys. When Damian goes to the bathroom, Tommy asks how she feels about the empty nest thing. She thinks he's faking caring about her feelings. She just wants him to keep her son safe on the job. The waiter brings Tommy a drink from a guy at the bar -- his former sponsee Derek, three sheets to the wind.
At home, Candy serves Lou a fancy dinner (using French phrases, which he asks her to lay off for a while). He takes a bite of mashed potatoes and finds something in them. He asks if it's what he thinks it is. She says they've connected and she loves taking care of him. He sits down, having a panic attack. She says she loves him. Her first impulse was to ask him to marry her. He tells her he had two impulses in response. The first was to say yes, the second was to pick up his knife and drill it into his brain. They like the first impulse better.
Franco and Carla finish up in bed, apparently proving Colleen wrong.
Feinberg preps Damian for being a probie, low man on the totem pole. Franco walks in the kitchen, announcing his athletic conquest of Carla: "At one point I kinda blacked out and when I came to we were banging in an entirely different room, we got any ginseng around here?" "Wow," Damian says, "who knew gay chicks were the way to go?" Pause. Franco demands clarification. He thinks they're jealous. Damian closes with a filthy zinger and Lou sets him straight that he's the king of the one liners. Damian says a chummy good-bye, slapping Lou on the back, causing him to spill his coffee. Lou can't wait to get him in the house.
The guys bring the fire truck by the hospital. The nurse tells Tommy and Lou about a kid who's still there because his parents are in the Greek isles. Lou goes in to cheer him up. Mike chats up a kid and takes him on the truck.
Sitting in the truck, Franco pours out his heart about his man-acting woman to a 10-year-old girl with cancer. Tommy finds a kid standing by himself outside the truck, intimidated by the size of it. He offers to take the kid in the suburban and run the siren. Lou goes to talk to the abandoned kid, Dominick, who greets him with a "what's up, Fatty?" and immediately starts messing around with the tools and giving him lip.
In the suburban, the kid with Tommy announces that he's going to die. His parents and nurses say it's ok, but he can see it in their faces. Tommy tells him he can't worry about that stuff and hoping can't hurt. The kid runs the siren again.
The nurse tells Feinberg she's never seen the kids so happy. He says it might be the best thing he's ever done and he doesn't care if he gets in trouble.
In the truck, Dominick quizzes Lou on how the truck runs. He knows about trucks from his dad. He suggests Lou get in the passenger seat and they'll pretend they're going to a fire. Lou closes the kid in the driver's side and goes around the front. And then the kid starts the truck. He takes off with Lou hanging from the passenger window. Shawn and Feinberg hop in Tommy's suburban and tell him to chase.
In the truck, Mike and Franco strap in their kids and Mike helps keep things cool by announcing they're going to die. Tommy narrowly avoids a car accident and the kid in the front seat is having a blast. After a high speed tear of several city blocks, Lou finally manages to climb in the passenger window and kill the ignition.
Tommy screeches to a stop behind them and the kid in the front seat thanks him saying, "I can die now."
In the fire truck Dominick pronounces the ride awesome. Lou tells him if he was that kid's parents he'd stay in Greece.
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