30 Rock (TV Series)

Corporate Crush (2007)

Tina Fey: Liz Lemon

Photos 

Quotes 

• Liz Lemon : [explaining why Jack wants to meet with her at Christie's auction house]  He goes to Sbarro when he's stressed, the New York Stock Exchange when he's horny, and Christie's when he's depressed.

• Liz Lemon : What are you doing?

  Jack : I'm watching the ballgame with you and the Floydster.

  Liz Lemon : But don't you kind of feel like a third wheel, Jack?

  Jack : No, Lemon: you're the third wheel.

  Liz Lemon : Excuse me?

  Jack : Well, it's really quite simple: men seek out the company of other men they admire and want to be like. Floyd is me 20 years ago, I'm Don Geiss 30 years ago... 20 years from now, Floyd'll be me, I'm gonna be Don Geiss and Don Geiss'll be dead.

  Liz Lemon : Who thinks like that?

  Jack : Men do. That's why you're the third wheel.

• [Jack is in a museum facing a painting, waiting for Liz Lemon to meet him there. Liz appears behind him without announcing her arrival] 

  Jack : You've been avoiding me, Lemon.

  Liz Lemon : How do you do that, without turning around?

  Jack : To be perfectly honest, the first couple of people I did that to were not you, but... here we are.

• Floyd : Well, that movie was a waste of time.

  Liz Lemon : I found it moving... my bowels!

  Floyd , Liz Lemon : [High five each other] 

• Jack : I haven't met your boyfriend.

  Liz Lemon : His name's Floyd.

  Jack : That's unfortunate.

• Phoebe : Mr. Donaghy. Hi, you probably don't remember me. I'm Phoebe. I handled the sale of your ex-wife's jewelry to an anonymous Arab.

  Jack : Oh, yes, of course.

  Phoebe : Those were such lovely pieces. The ruby and diamond cluster ring was particularly exquisite.

  Jack : That was her engagement ring. You know, I took the money from the sale of those pieces, and I bought a sailboat, and I named it after my ex-wife, and I sank it.

  Liz Lemon : It's true. "The Bianca Blows" is somewhere at the bottom of the Peconic Bay.