- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: You're wrong about Adrian Monk.
- Agent Thorpe: Am I?
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Yep. I know he's a little strange, and he can be difficult. But I can tell you of at least twelve different cases where all of the evidence...
- Agent Thorpe: Captain Stottlemeyer, you're looking at a half a billion dollars worth of equipment. Are you trying to tell me your funny little friend is smarter than all of this?
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: [smiles] Yes, I am.
- Adrian Monk: [writing] "Dear Kimberly, I am sorry I inadvertently sent the SWAT team to Kayla's slumber party and made you cry. I am sorry about the nightmares. It will never happen again. Adrian Monk."
- Medical Examiner: Blow to the back of the head, knocking him unconscious...
- Natalie Teeger: Oh, no.
- Medical Examiner: Petichial hemorrhaging, indicating suffocation...
- Natalie Teeger: Oh, no.
- Medical Examiner: Small puncture wound, injected with poison...
- Natalie Teeger: Oh, no!
- Medical Examiner: ...plus four stab wounds, two gunshots to the chest, and tire tracks across the upper torso.
- Lt. Randall Disher: So the cause of death was...?
- Medical Examiner: Pretty much everything.
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: [as they watch Randy play "I Don't Need a Badge" as a one-man band] There's a flaw in your plan.
- Agent Thorpe: What's that?
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Well, the first person that attacks him
- [Randy]
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: may not necessarily be your serial killer. It may be me.
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: This is a complete waste of time, and you know that.
- Agent Thorpe: Did you say something?
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Yeah. I said, "Monk is right, sir." I've never read one of these "psychological profiles" that meant squat
- [nothing]
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: , particularly if it was compiled by one of these gizmos
- [PDAs]
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: .
- Agent Thorpe: These gizmos, as you call them, are going to catch our killer. Mark my words.
- Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: [after throwing Agent Keao's high tech PDA at the killer and knocking him out, to Agent Thorpe & Keao] Hey, you were right. Your gizmos caught the killer.
- [Agent Thorpe and Keao express contempt but remain silent and walk up to the suspect]