The Addams Family (TV Series)
Dead and Breakfast (1992)
Rip Taylor: Uncle Fester
Quotes
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Uncle Fester : Hey, what's the matter?
Wednesday Addams : The robins are singing, the sky is azure blue... it's another miserable sunny day, Uncle Fester.
Uncle Fester : Well, gee, if you two are feeling down, do what I do... blow yourself up!
[Fester pulls out a plunger with wires attached to himself, and pushes it. An explosion occurs]
Uncle Fester : See? I feel better already!
[He falls through a hole]
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Uncle Fester : That mystic stuff is a bunch of hooey!
Grandmama Addams : It is not! I'll show you!
[grabs Fester's foot]
Uncle Fester : Hey!
Grandmama Addams : You know the length of your toenails reveals a lot about your personality...
[analyzes Fester's toenails]
Grandmama Addams : Huh... I don't get it. According to this toe, you're supposed to be bright.
Uncle Fester : That's me! Watch!
[charges a lightbulb]
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Uncle Fester : Did somebody say crime? That's my middle name!
Wednesday Addams : I thought plumbing was your middle name.
Uncle Fester : But that was last week. I've always been known as a sleuthist!
Pugsley Addams : Wow! Can you help us solve the mystery?
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Uncle Fester : Did someone mention family dance? Might I recommend the South Idaho Tongue Pull?
Gomez Addams : On a Friday?
Uncle Fester : Oh, yeah. Hey, how about the Face Slide?
[the family cheers]