Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (2009)

Dan Whelton: Foyer Bartender

Quotes 

• Denice the Bridesmaid : [had a bit too much to drink]  Hey, Connor.

  Connor Mead : Hey.

  Denice the Bridesmaid : How you been?

  Connor Mead : Well, I'm at a wedding. I'm seeing ghosts in the john. I've been better.

  Denice the Bridesmaid : What were you and Sandra's mom talking about so *intensely*?

  Connor Mead : Casual sex.

  [which causes her to splutter in her drink] 

  Connor Mead : So what's your stance on casual sex, bridesmaid?

  Denice the Bridesmaid : On top! I mean, I'm... I'm for it.

  Connor Mead : Oh, speaking of which, I think I owe you an apology. I've enjoyed the company of all the other bridesmaids except you. I mean, you must feel terribly left out.

  Denice the Bridesmaid : [nods]  I do.

  [goofy smile, chuckles] 

  Connor Mead : I do hope that there's some way to rectify this injustice.

  Denice the Bridesmaid : Well, you know what I always say is, "To think globally, act locally."

  [chuckles] 

  Connor Mead : [chuckles]  Then, before I, uh, commence the launch code... Are you the one my brother slept with? I don't like to cross swords.

  Denice the Bridesmaid : Wait, what? Your brother slept with one of the bridesmaids?

  Connor Mead : Okay, I guess it wasn't you. Okay, from now on, I don't... cross swords. Listen, forget I even brought it up. Hey, why don't you scamper up to my room, boil some water, get the chicken claw out of my suitcase, do some light stretching, and I will be up in five?

  Denice the Bridesmaid : [whispers very softly]  Chicken claw. Okay.

  Connor Mead : Chicken claw.

  Denice the Bridesmaid : Okay.

  [chuckles, goes on her mission, whispering to herself:] 

  Denice the Bridesmaid : Suitcase. Stretching. Scamper. Five minutes.

  Connor Mead : [to the amazed bartender]  And that's how it's done, son. That is how it's done.

  Foyer Bartender : Does it work on guys?

  Connor Mead : [only momentarily taken aback]  Probably.