- Governor Eugene Xavier Gatling: Did you powder your feet in the Army?
- Benson DuBois: No, sir, the army had a tendency to frown on makeup.
- Clayton Runnymede Endicott III: Where were you?
- Benson DuBois: The tenant's association in my building held a meeting, and they elected me President.
- Clayton Runnymede Endicott III: Who on earth would want such a thankless job?
- Benson DuBois: Nobody, but I was the only one late for the meeting, so they elected me.