The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

Pilot (2007)

Kaley Cuoco: Penny

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Sheldon : Uhm, Penny, that's where I sit.

  Penny : So sit next to me.

  Sheldon : No, I sit there.

  Penny : What's the difference?

  Sheldon : What's the difference?

  Leonard : Here we go.

  Sheldon : In the winter, that seat is close enough to the radiator to remain warm, and yet not so close as to cause perspiration. In the summer, it's directly in the path of a cross-breeze created by opening windows there and there. It faces the television at an angle that is neither direct, thus discouraging conversation, nor so far wide as to create a parallax distortion. I could go on.

• Penny : So, what do you guys do for fun around here?

  Sheldon : Well, today we tried masturbating for money.

• Leonard : So, tell us about you.

  Penny : Um, me? Okay - I'm a Sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to know.

  Sheldon : Yes - it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that the sun's apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality.

  Penny : [stares at Sheldon in utter confusion]  Participateinthewhat?

  Leonard : [scrambling to save face]  I think what Sheldon is trying to say is that Sagittarius wouldn't have been our first guess.

  Penny : Oh, yeah - lot of people think I'm a water sign.

• Penny : Four years I lived with him! Four years, I mean that's like as long as high school!

  Sheldon : It took you FOUR YEARS to get through high school?

• Wolowitz : Bonne Douche!

  Penny : I'm sorry?

  Wolowitz : It's French for "Good shower". It's a sentiment I can express in six languages.

  Leonard : Save it for your blog, Howard.

• Penny : [to Raj]  I'm sorry, do you speak English?

  Wolowitz : Oh, he speaks English, he just can't speak to women.

  Penny : Really? Why?

  Wolowitz : He's kind of a nerd. Juice box?

• Penny : I'm a vegetarian. Except for fish. And the occasional steak, I love steak!

• Wolowitz : Enchanté, mademoiselle. Howard Wolowitz, Caltech department of applied physics, you may be familiar with some of my work, it's currently orbiting Jupiter's largest moon taking high resolution digital photographs...?

  Penny : Penny... I work at the Cheesecake Factory!

• Penny : Oh, I'm so sorry, I'm such a mess. And on top of everything else, I'm all gross from moving. And my stupid shower doesn't even work.

  Leonard : Our shower works.

  Penny : Really? Would it be totally weird if I used it?

  Sheldon : Yes.

  Leonard : No.

  Sheldon : No?

  Leonard : No.

  Sheldon : No.

• Penny : So, what do you guys do for fun in this town?

  Sheldon : Well, today we tried masturbating for money.

• Sheldon : It's just some quantum mechanics with a little string theory doodling around the edges. That part there, that's just a joke. It's a spoof of the Born-Oppenheimer approximation.

  Penny : So you're like one of those Beautiful Mind genius guys. This is really impressive.

  Leonard : I have a board. If you like boards, this is my board.

  Penny : Holy smokes!

  Sheldon : If by "holy smokes", you mean a derivative restatement of the kind of stuff you can find scribbled on the wall of any men's room at MIT, sure.