- Elton Pope: When you're a kid, they tell you it's all... grow up. Get a job. Get married. Get a house. Have a kid, and that's it. But the truth is, the world is so much stranger than that. It's so much darker. And so much madder. And so much better.
- The Doctor: You're not from Raxacoricofallapatorius, are you?
- Victor Kennedy: No, I'm not! They're swine! I spit on them! I was born on their twin planet.
- The Doctor: Really? What's the twin planet of Raxacoricofallapatorius?
- Victor Kennedy: Clom.
- [the Abzorbaloff is about to absorb Elton when the TARDIS appears in front of them]
- The Doctor: [Exits the TARDIS and addresses Elton] Someone wants a word with you.
- [Rose exits the TARDIS]
- Rose Tyler: [annoyed] You upset my mum.
- Elton Pope: [confused, nods at Abzorbaloff] Great, big, absorbing creature from outer space and you're having a go at me?
- Rose Tyler: No one upsets my mum!
- [holding Ursula who turned to a floor tile with a face]
- Elton Pope: It's a relationship... of sorts. But we manage. We've even got a bit of a love life.
- Ursula Blake: Oh, let's not go into that...
- [after presenting a photo of Jackie in his cell phone]
- Elton Pope: I had to work very hard. She keeps everything very close to her chest.
- Ursula Blake: That's a hell of a chest.
- Rose Tyler: [Rose splashes water from a blue bucket onto an alien and nothing happens] You said the blue bucket!
- The Doctor: I said *not* blue!
- Elton Pope: Turns out I've had the most terrible things happen. And the most brilliant things. And sometimes, well, I can't tell the difference. They're all the same thing. They're... they're just me. You know, Stephen King said once, he said, "salvation and damnation are the same thing." And I never knew what he meant. But I do now.
- Victor Kennedy: You will surrender to me, Doctor! Or this one
- [points to Elton]
- Victor Kennedy: dies. You see, I've read about you, Doctor. I've studied you. So passionate! So sweet! You wouldn't let an innocent man die. And I'll absorb him. Unless you give yourself to me!
- The Doctor: [scratches the back of his neck] Sweet? Maybe. Passionate? I suppose. But don't ever mistake that for "nice" !
- Elton Pope: [VO] And that's when it all changed. That Tuesday night in March. That's when he arrived.
- Victor Kennedy: Lights.
- Elton Pope: [VO] That's when we met Victor Kennedy and the Golden Age was gone.
- Victor Kennedy: So, we met at last. "LINDA!"
- Mr. Skinner: Pleased to me you, sir. I'm sorry, was the music too loud?
- Victor Kennedy: No, no, no, I don't shake hands. Back, back. I suffer from a skin complaint. Ex-ee-ma.
- Elton Pope: Oh, you mean Eczema.
- Victor Kennedy: Oh, this is worse. Much worse. I blister to the touch. Back, back all of you further, further. Thank you.
- Elton Pope: Sorry, don't mind me asking, but who are you?
- Victor Kennedy: I am your salvation.
- Elton Pope: I was all cozy when all of a sudden
- [windows smash behind him, Elton wakes up abruptly]
- Elton Pope: There was glass everywhere and I was barefoot! I had to create a rudimentary pulley system just to get to me boots!
- Rose Tyler: You upset my mum.
- Elton Pope: Right. Big absorbing alien over there, and you're having a go at me?