The Simpsons (TV Series)

Bart Sells His Soul (1995)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Barney Gumble, Abraham Lincoln, Santa's Little Helper, Krusty the Klown, Street Sweeper Driver, Derelict

Quotes 

• Homer Simpson : Hey Marge, remember when we used to make out to this hymn?

  Marge Simpson : [chuckles wryly] 

• Chief Wiggum : [sees a crazy hobo running around screaming]  Ralphie, you stay here in the car while daddy tries to talk some sense into this raving derelict.

  [Goes outside] 

  Derelict : Garalmglkaklafja!

  Chief Wiggum : [stands there looking]  All right all right slow down, slow down!

  Derelict : Alfred Hitchcock stole every idea I've ever had! He came into my room...!

  Chief Wiggum : Who's been stealing your thoughts?

  Derelict : Did you ever read Ye Olde Curiosity Shoppe?

  [mutters] 

  Derelict : John Gielgud...! I have powers!

• Moe Szyslak : So, come on. I need a name that says friendly, all-American cooking.

  Homer Simpson : How about Chairman Moe's Magic Wok?

  Barney Gumble : I like it!

  Moe Szyslak : Hmm. Nah, I want something that says people can have a have a nice, relaxing time.

  Homer Simpson : I got it! Madman Moe's Pressure Cooker!

  Barney Gumble : I like it!

  Moe Szyslak : Hey! How about Uncle Moe's Family Feedbag?

  Barney Gumble : I hate it.

• [Uncle Moe approaches to Snake and gives the check to him] 

  Snake : Oh dude, you did not smile, we eat for free. Come on Shoshanna, let's roll! Ha-ha!

  Moe Szyslak : [Snake and Shoshanna left the restaurant as Uncle Moe plea for his song]  But I sang you the potato stuffings! Come on! I sang you the potato stuffings!

  Krusty the Clown : Look at the vein on that guy's forehead. He's gonna blow!

  [Moe's left eyelid flickers involuntarily and dangerously as the siren begins to blare] 

  Girl with Sore Teeth : Unky Moe?

  [Uncle Moe saw a girl as she tugs his apron] 

  Moe Szyslak : [He tries to hide in his anger]  Whaaat... is it, sweetheart?

  Girl with Sore Teeth : My sodie is too cold. My teef hurt!

  Moe Szyslak : Oh, your "teef" hurt, huh? Your "teef" hurt...

  [He loses it] 

  Moe Szyslak : Well, that's too freakin' bad, you hear me! I'll tell you where you can put your freakin' sodie, too!

  [the entire restaurant gasps and one customer says "Oh my goodness!"] 

  Tod Flanders : [Maude gets Todd's ears covered]  Ow, my freakin' ears!

  [Ned and Maude gasp] 

  Maude Flanders : Oh, let's go, dear!

  Ned Flanders : Well, I expect that type of language at Denny's but not here!

  Moe Szyslak : [All of the customers have left the restaurant and Uncle Moe give a final plea for his final offer to the customers]  Aw, come on, folks, wait. Please come back. Please! I got a new offer. Whenever Uncle Moe threatens you, you get a free steak... fish.

  [the last customer walks out the door and slams it, and Uncle Moe sighs heavily] 

• Homer Simpson : Bart, you didn't finish your spaghetti and Moe balls!

  Homer Simpson : [thinking]  Silence you fool! It can be ours!

  Homer Simpson : [eating the spaghetti with his mouth full]  Run boy run! Run for your life boy!

• Moe Szyslak : If you like good food good fun and a whole lot of crazy crap on the walls then come on down to Uncle Moe's Family Feedbag.

  Announcer : At Moe's we serve good old fashioned home cooking deep fried to perfection.

  Moe Szyslak : Now that's Moe like it! So bring the whole family mom dad kids. Uh no old people. They're not covered by our insurance. It's fun! And remember our guarantee if i'm not smiling when your check comes your meal's on me Uncle Moe!

  Chorus : [singing]  Come to Uncle Moe's for family fun it's good good good good Good good good.

  Homer Simpson : Mmm! Sounds good.

• Homer Simpson : Look marge its Moe the guy from the ad and he knows my name.