Two and a Half Men (TV Series)

Madame and Her Special Friend (2005)

Angus T. Jones: Jake Harper

Quotes 

• Alan : [Alan finds Jake on his knees, praying in the living room]  What are you praying for?

  Jake Harper : I have a math test on Monday.

  Alan : Oh. So you're, uh, you're praying for a good grade.

  Jake Harper : No, that never works. I'm praying for the teacher to get sick.

  Alan : Have you considered just studying for the test?

  Jake Harper : How would that help?

  Alan : Okay, listen to me. Even if we were to assume God would be willing to give your teacher a cold...

  Jake Harper : Anthrax.

  Alan : All right, that's it! No more praying!

  Jake Harper : What are you, the Supreme Court?

  Alan : How do you know about the Supreme Court and prayer?

  Jake Harper : This guy on TV, Reverend Don. He talks to God.

  Alan : And he said you should pray to strike down your teacher?

  Jake Harper : No, activist judges. But I figured, why can't it work on Ms. Stanley? Oh, and you know what else? If I send Reverend Don money, God'll make me *rich*.

  Alan : And did you send him money?

  Jake Harper : Wouldn't you?

• Alan : Jake, are you praying?

  Jake Harper : It's okay. I'm not in school.

• Norma : [Jake sneezes]  God bless you!

  Jake Harper : He'd better! I sent him five bucks!