- [after Kelso tries in vain to convince the others he had sex with Brooke, she comes to the basement]
- Brooke: Kelso, we have to talk about doing it at the Molly Hatchet concert.
- Michael Kelso: Just a second, Brooke.
- [to Fez]
- Michael Kelso: Burn!
- [to Eric and Donna]
- Michael Kelso: Burn!
- [to Hyde]
- Michael Kelso: Burn!
- [to Jackie]
- Michael Kelso: Burn!
- [Kelso runs upstairs to the kitchen]
- Michael Kelso: [to Kitty] Burn!
- [to Red]
- Michael Kelso: Burn!
- [Kelso runs back downstairs]
- Michael Kelso: So, Brooke. What did you want to talk about?
- Brooke: I just found out I'm pregnant.
- Michael Kelso: [defensively] I never touched her!
- Brooke: I don't make it with guys at concerts! I read two periodicals a week about the Dewey Decimal System, which I'm sure you've never heard of!
- Michael Kelso: I've heard of Dewey Decimal! It's Donald Duck's nephew!
- Kid: I'm *trying* to *read*!
- Michael Kelso: Don't be a sissy! Here, here's a firecracker. Go live a little.