The Simpsons (TV Series)

Treehouse of Horror IX (1998)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Barney, Krusty, Itchy, Poochie, Kodos

Photos 

Quotes 

• Krusty the Clown : [dressed as a vampire; reading from an offscreen cue card]  Hey, hey! Tonight I'm going to suck!

  [pauses in confusion; reads from another card] 

  Krusty the Clown : Your blood.

• [Homer is dressed in tattered clothes, and eating beans from a can] 

  Marge Simpson : Oh, Homer you're not going as a hobo again?

  Homer Simpson : Going where?

• Bart Simpson : [pushes his food away]  I just lost my appetite.

  Lisa Simpson : [pushes her food away]  Me, too.

  Homer Simpson : [grabs Lisa's food]  Wait, mine came back!

• Marge : Homer, Kang is Maggie's father.

  Homer : You intergalactic hussy.

  [cries] 

  Homer : Was he better than me?

• Marge Simpson : [after the aliens left]  Suckers!

  Homer Simpson : [to Maggie]  Come on, Maggie. Let's go home.

  Maggie : [removes pacifier]  Very well, I'll drive!

  [laughs] 

  Maggie : I need blood.

• Homer Simpson : [singing]  Mama took those batteries / She took them away / Mama took those batteries / Size double-A!

• Homer Simpson : [after he pulls Maggie's legs off]  Look, Marge! Maggie lost her baby legs!

• [Kodos and Kang appear at The Simpsons' door] 

  Homer : Oh no, Mormons!

  Kang : Actually, we're Quantum Presbyterians.

• Apu Nahasapeemapetilon : Snake? You're dead!

  Homer Simpson : I know you are, but what am I?

• Homer Simpson : [the evil tupee grabs Bart's face]  I'll show you hair!

  [Homer punches Bart four times] 

  Bart Simpson : Ow, that's my face you idiot!

  Homer Simpson : IDIOT! Why you little!

  [strangles Bart] 

  Homer Simpson : I'll show you! I'll kill you!

• Itchy : [Itchy is trying to kill Lisa and Bart with a chainsaw and ends up cutting off Scratchy's arms]  Sorry.

  Scratchy : It happens.

• Scratchy : [Itchy has just cut off Scratchy's head and put a candle inside Scratchy's mouth and Bart and Lisa laugh]  Why are you laughing?

  Itchy : Hey! They're laughing at your pain!

  Scratchy : [reattaches his head]  That's mean!

  Itchy : Let's teach them a lesson!