The Simpsons (TV Series)

The Wizard of Evergreen Terrace (1998)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Grampa, Bill

Quotes 

• [Lisa tells Homer about Thomas Edison] 

  Homer : No one man can do all that. You're a liar, honey. A dirty, rotten liar.

• Lisa Simpson : Dad, women won't like being shot in the face.

  Homer : Women will like what I tell them to like, honey!

• Homer : Ohhh, stupid movies. Who invented these dumb things, anyway?

  [menacingly] 

  Homer : Was it you, Bart?

• Marge : [Homer won't stop rambling about Edison]  All right already! Everyone knows the man accomplished a lot. Maybe because he didn't spend every waking moment talking about Thomas Edison.

  Homer : Oh, that's where you're wrong, Marge. He was a shameless self-promoter.

• Homer : Well, I quit my job just like you said to.

  Marge : I didn't tell you to quit your job.

  Homer : Yes, you did. I remember your exact words. You said I should quit my job and become an inventor, or you'd torch the house.

  Marge : That doesn't sound like me.

• Homer : Now, here's my Everything's Okay Alarm.

  [Homer turns it on and it makes a deafening noise] 

  Homer : THIS WILL SOUND EVERY THREE SECONDS, UNLESS SOMETHING ISN'T OKAY.

  Marge : Turn it off, Homer!

  Homer : IT CAN'T BE TURNED OFF!