The Simpsons (TV Series)

The Wandering Juvie (2004)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Clerk #2, Mayor Quimby, Sideshow Mel, Groundskeeper Willie, Krusty the Clown, Itchy, Inmate #3, Window Man

Quotes 

• Warden : So why do you want to become a Juvinal Hall prison guard?

  Homer : I believe the children are our future, unless we stop 'em now!

  Warden : Welcome aboard.

  [the warden holds up a nightstick] 

  Warden : This end's for beating, this end's for holding.

  [gives it to Homer] 

  Homer : Uh-huh. When does training start?

  Warden : It just finished.

• Marge Simpson : [crying]  My baby boy is in jail. I'm the worst mom in the world!

  Homer : It's not all your fault. All these years I watched you turn our son into a time bomb and yet I did nothing. So in a way, I too am a victim. Of you.

• Warden : [Bart and Gina are escaping through a window]  Can't you go any faster?

  Custodian : Well, I can close it faster, or I can close it right.

  Warden : Can't you do both?

  Custodian : Talk to the union.

• Mayor Quimby : If anyone asks, you're my niece.

  Quimby's niece : I am your niece.

  Mayor Quimby : Oh god, I'm an abomination.