- Principal Skinner: Mr. and Mrs. Simpson, we have transcended incorrigible. I don't think suspension or expulsion will do the trick. I think it behooves us all to consider... deportation.
- Marge Simpson: Deportation? You mean kick Bart out of the country?
- Homer Simpson: Hear him out, Marge.
- Homer Simpson: Wait a minute, Skinner! How do we know some principal in France isn't pulling the same scam you are?
- Principal Skinner: Well, for one thing you wouldn't be getting a French boy. You would be getting an Albanian.
- Homer Simpson: You mean all-white with pink eyes?
- [Marge and Lisa come home, and find Homer lying on his back, unable to move]
- Marge Simpson: Homer! What happened?
- Homer Simpson: The boy... bring me the boy.
- Marge Simpson: Homer, I'd love a glass of that wine Bart brought us.
- Homer Simpson: [grunting] Sorry, Marge. Some wiseguy stuck a cork in the bottle.
- Bart Simpson: Oh, mon pere. Quel boufou!
- [translated, "My father. What a buffoon!"]
- Homer Simpson: You hear that, Marge? My boy speaks French!
- [Bart has found a cherry bomb]
- Milhouse Van Houten: So you're gonna flush it?
- Bart Simpson: What can I say? I got a weakness for the classics.
- Principal Skinner: The disturbing incident I was referring to happened this morning, when your sun flushed an explosive device down the boys' lavatory.
- Homer Simpson: Heh heh, that old gag.
- Homer Simpson: [to Skinner about Bart] He makes me crazy twelve months of the year. At least you get the summer off.
- Homer Simpson: Maybe Lisa's right about America being the land of opportunity, and maybe Adil has a point about the machinery of capitalism being oiled with the blood of the workers.
- [while cleaning his room, a box rattles]
- Bart Simpson: Hello... what have we here?
- [opens the box]
- Bart Simpson: [gasp] A cherry bomb! I thought I blew all you guys up!
- Lisa Simpson: What do you know about France?
- [in a jealous tone]
- Bart Simpson: I know I'm going and you're not.