The Simpsons (TV Series)

Like Father, Like Clown (1991)

Dan Castellaneta: Krusty The Klown, Homer Simpson, Man on PartyLine, Hyman's Friend, Academy Award Playhouse Announcer, Itchy, Itchy Jr., Monsignor Daly, Barney Gumble

Quotes 

• Homer : Boy, you don't have to follow in my footsteps.

  Bart : Don't worry, I don't even like using the bathroom after you.

  Homer : Why you little...

• Homer Simpson : [after hearing Krusty pray in Hebrew]  He's talking funny talk.

• Moe Szyslak : [tearing up while watching Krusty and his father sing on TV]  I've got something in my eye.

  Barney Gumble : [offering filthy handkerchief]  Here, take my hanky.

  Moe Szyslak : [taking it and jumping back in shock, seeing its condition]  Euueeh!

• Krusty the Clown : [Krusty is telling the Simpsons the story of how he became estranged from his father, Rabbi Krustofski when he was the entertainer at a rabbi's convention]  My father would have never suspected a thing if it were not for one rowdy Rabbi.

  Rowdy Rabbi : [a Rabbi in the audience stands up with a bottle full of Seltzer]  Hey, funny man!

  Krusty the Clown : No, no, no!

  [the Rabbi sprays Krusty washing off his clown makeup unmasking him to the audience] 

  Rabbi Hyman Krustofski : [recognising his son]  Herschel? Herschel! Oy, vei is mir! You have brought shame on our family. Oh, if you were a musician or a jazz singer this I could forgive but... but, but this. I never want to see you again you, you... clown!

  [Krusty walks off the stage in tears] 

  Krusty the Clown : And I haven't seen my father since.

  Lisa : That is so sad.

  Bart : Krusty, do you think about your father a lot?

  Krusty the Clown : All the time. Except when I'm at the track. Then it's all business.

• Krusty the Clown : Papa, when I grow up, can I be a clown?

  Rabbi Hyman Krustofski : No, a clown is not a respected member of the community.

  Krusty the Clown : But I want to make people laugh.

  Rabbi Hyman Krustofski : Herschel, life is not fun. Life is serious. Seltzer is for drinking, not for spraying. Pie is for noshing, not for throwing.

  Krusty the Clown : But Papa...

  Rabbi Hyman Krustofski : But nothing! You'll do as I say, or you'll get such a zetz that you won't even know what hit you!

• Krusty : My father was a rabbi. His father was a rabbi. His father's fath... well, you get the idea.

• Krusty the Clown : [emotionally]  Didn't Itchy, Jr. look happy playing with his father? And didn't Scratchy, Jr. look happy playing with his dad until they got run over by the thresher? Wasn't that a beautiful cartoon?

  [pauses, then breaks down crying] 

  Krusty the Clown : For the love of God, cut to a commercial!

• Homer Simpson : Mel Brooks is Jewish?