Seinfeld (TV Series)

The Sponge (1995)

Jerry Seinfeld: Jerry Seinfeld

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jerry Seinfeld : So you really like this guy?

  Elaine Benes : Very much.

  Jerry Seinfeld : How's the sexual chemistry?

  Elaine Benes : Haven't been in the lab yet.

• Jerry Seinfeld : [about Lena]  She's giving and caring and generally concerned about the welfare of others. I can't be with someone like that.

  George Costanza : I see what you mean.

• [first lines] 

  Jerry Seinfeld : People can be so vain, don't you know? I have a friend who wears eyeglasses, no prescription in the glasses, because he thinks he looks more intelligent. Now, why? Why do we think that glasses makes us look more intelligent? Is it from the endless hours of reading and studying and researching that this person supposedly blew out their eyeballs? And that's why they need the glasses? It's just a corrective device. If you see someone with a hearing aid, you don't think, "Oh, they must have been listening real good... yeah, to a lot of important stuff." No, they are deaf. They can't hear.

• Jerry Seinfeld : [about Lena]  She said I wasn't sponge-worthy. Wouldn't waste a sponge on me.

• Elaine Benes : I just couldn't decide if he was really sponge-worthy.

  Jerry Seinfeld : Sponge-worthy?

  Elaine Benes : Yeah Jerry, I have to conserve the sponges.