The Nanny (TV Series)

Oy Vey, You're Gay (1995)

Charles Shaughnessy: Maxwell Sheffield

Photos 

Quotes 

• Fran Fine : When you fill out your taxes, what do you put in Marital Status: S or M?

  Maxwell Sheffield : S.

  Fran Fine : All right, so you told Uncle Sam you're single. Maybe it's time you told yourself.

  Maxwell Sheffield : But I want to be an M again.

  Fran Fine : Yeah, well, I want to be an M too. But first you got to get out there and make an S out of yourself.

• Maxwell Sheffield : [the power goes out in the elevator]  Miss Fine, what're you doing?

  Fran Fine : I'm looking for the emergency phone!

  Maxwell Sheffield : *That's* not it.

  Fran Fine : Oh! Then I should probably quit talking into it.

• Grace Sheffield : [Maxwell is incredibly hung over]  Daddy, are you sick?

  Maxwell Sheffield : No, no. I'm not sick. I'm fine, Margaret.

  Fran Fine : That's Gracie.

  Maxwell Sheffield : Oh.

  [aside, to Fran] 

  Maxwell Sheffield : When did we have her?

  Fran Fine : Never mind when we had her, when can we start making another one?

• Maxwell Sheffield : Not a single woman at the party last night was interested in me.

  [folds hands over his lap] 

  Fran Fine : Well maybe *that* had something to do with it.

  Maxwell Sheffield : [looks towards his groin]  Excuse me?

  Fran Fine : Your wedding ring!

• Fran Fine : [climbs through the roof of the elevator]  HEEEEELLLLP! Oh my God!

  Maxwell Sheffield : What, another rat?

  Fran Fine : Worse! There's an echo in here!

  [whines] 

  Fran Fine : I just heard my *own voice!*