The Muppet Show (TV Series)

Lynda Carter (1980)

Jim Henson: Kermit the Frog, Link Hogthrob, Muppet Newsman, Waldorf

Quotes 

• Kermit the Frog : Now, there's been a lot of talk about superheroes on tonight's show. So, here is a story of sheer terror. When civilization is threatened by one of the most frightening creatures ever to roam the Earth. Who can save us? Ladies and gentlemen, our own Miss Piggy, starring as Wonder Pig.

  Lynda Carter : [laughing]  Wonder Pig?

  Kermit the Frog : A word of caution. There are scenes in this story which may not be suitable for adults.

• Statler : How come chickens are getting so big on this show?

  Waldorf : Well, chickens thrive on corn.

  [both laugh and clucking] 

• The Newsman : Here's a Muppet News Flash. Dateline: Egypt. Archaeologists today discovered an ancient tomb more than 5,000 years old in the Nungal Valley. An inscription over the tomb warned that the crocodile god, Rezal-evad-gib... That's Rezal-evad-gib... would wreck a terrible vengeance on anyone who entered the tomb or even pronounced his name aloud.

  [looks up] 

  The Newsman : That's a ridiculous story. I never...

  [suddenly, a crocodile appears and tries to eat the Newsman] 

• Waldorf : Mmm. What'd you think of Lynda?

  Statler : Terrific!

  Waldorf : Yeah. How about that rubber band?

  Statler : Well, make 'em into a tire and drive 'em to Pittsburgh!

  [both laugh] 

• Kermit the Frog : Okay, well, that last sketch must have pleased you poultry lovers. So, here's something for the sheep fanciers!

• Kermit the Frog : Ladies and gentlemen, how long has it been since you've watched a good old fashioned human sacrifice? Too long, you say? Well, watch this.