Monk (TV Series)

Mr. Monk Meets the Godfather (2004)

Bitty Schram: Sharona Fleming

Photos 

Quotes 

• Disher : You know, some people think I'm dangerous.

  Sharona Fleming : Yeah, people driving behind you.

• [the FBI want Monk to wear a wire for a meeting with a mob boss] 

  Adrian Monk : Here's the thing: I can't have anything taped to my chest.

  Agent Colmes : Ah, that's fine. Come here, let me show you this. You see, these days we can put a transmitter just about anywhere on the human body. You have six options.

  [Monk and Sharona examine the list] 

  Adrian Monk : Number One... is out. Number Two... you-you wouldn't actually shave me there, would you?

  [Colmes nods] 

  Adrian Monk : Okay, no thank you. Number Three...

  Sharona Fleming : What if you had to sit down?

  Adrian Monk : Right, good point. Number Four...

  [pause] 

  Adrian Monk : Even if I *die*, don't let them do Number Four.

  Disher : Number Five?

  Adrian Monk : ...Okay. I'll do it. I'll try that.

  Sharona Fleming : That's only for women!

  Disher : Oh! Right.

  Adrian Monk : Oh, yeah. Ah, Number Six... I can do that.

  Agent Colmes : Number Six? Great.

  Adrian Monk : Not Four.

• [Monk and Sharona are brought to meet mob boss Lucarelli, who's chopping fish in the kitchen of a restaurant] 

  Salvatore Lucarelli : Mr. Monk!

  [he shakes hands, Adrian immediately starts wiping his down] 

  Sharona Fleming : Oh, he-he does this with everybody, really, he doesn't mean any disrespect.

  Salvatore Lucarelli : [shrugs, chuckling]  I have blood on my hands.

  Adrian Monk : Yes, you do.

• Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : [walks into the room, speaking to an agent]  Hey! I showed them my ID downstairs. I just got to talk to my friend! You reaching for your gun? If you're reaching for your gun, you'd better pull it. Stand aside.

  [says hello to Monk, then turns to Colmes] 

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Colmes! What do you think you're doing?

  Agent Colmes : This is a federal operation, Captain. You have no business being here.

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Well, neither does he. What's going on?

  Sharona Fleming : They want Adrian to go undercover in the Lucarelli family.

  [Disher looks at a photo of Sharona speaking with Fat Tony outside Salvatore's restaurant] 

  Disher : What's up with this picture of you and Fat Tony?

  Sharona Fleming : Nothing! And don't call him that!

  [She finds it offensive, because Fat Tony isn't fat any more] 

  Disher : What? Are you defending him?

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : [to Colmes]  Why don't you start by telling them about what happened to the last agent that tried to infiltrate the family? That means start by telling them where we found the body buried!

  Sharona Fleming : Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. Buried?

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Actually the parts that they found.

  Agent Colmes : Okay, that's a different situation. That agent's cover was blown. Monk's been invited in. They already know that he's a cop.

• Vince : Uncle Sal told me to keep an eye on you. For your own protection.

  Adrian Monk : It's a little insulting. I haven't needed a babysitter since I was nineteen.

  Sharona Fleming : You had a babysitter when you were nineteen?

  Adrian Monk : Everybody did. It was the late 70s. It was a crazy time.