Monk (TV Series)

Mr. Monk and the Big Reward (2006)

Tony Shalhoub: Adrian Monk

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jenny Manderville : [to Randy]  So am I in trouble?

  Lt. Randall Disher : No, not this time, miss. But listen, if you feeling like finding someone to confess to, you should call a priest.

  [to an officer] 

  Lt. Randall Disher : Would you escort Miss Mandeville out?

  [Monk, Natalie and Stottlemeyer come out of the Captain's office. Disher turns to them and whistles a cuckoo whistle] 

  Adrian Monk : Who is she?

  Lt. Randall Disher : Looney Tune of the Month. Her name's uh, Jennie Mandeville. She keeps on coming in here and confessing to stuff.

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : What was it this time?

  [since yesterday, Jennie came in and confessed to stealing a pen from a bank] 

  Lt. Randall Disher : Well, she comes in, same as yesterday, and says she accidentally killed her roommate. So I take her into the back room and I turn on the tape recorder. Turns out her roommate was a hamster.

  Adrian Monk : [chuckles]  She didn't look unstable.

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : They never do.

• Dr. Charles Kroger : What would you do if you had a million dollars?

  Adrian Monk : Well, I guess I'd hire you full time, and keep you on retainer 24/7. Maybe I'd buy you a house right next to mine so that I could just drop in, anytime.

  [Chuckles] 

  Adrian Monk : This is fun. What would you do with a million dollars?

  Dr. Charles Kroger : [Cautiously]  Buy an island... a desert island... in the middle of nowhere.

  Adrian Monk : So we would do our sessions over the phone?

  Dr. Charles Kroger : Heh, you see this island, in my mind... no phone service.

  Adrian Monk : I guess I'd have to buy a boat.

  Dr. Charles Kroger : You see, that's funny because you see this island, in my fantasy... no dock.

  Adrian Monk : Well, may the best man win.

• [Gladys, while cleaning, finds a note saying "Gladys, don't forget to clean *under* the table. "Under" in the Post-It note is underlined, emphasizing its importance. In Stottlemeyer's office, meanwhile...] 

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Here's the coroner's report. Victim's name: Danny Chasen, it's probably an alias. The victim was poisoned. Somebody spiked his all-natural barley tea with ammonia.

  Adrian Monk : Was he part of the heist?

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Looks like it. They found some hair samples in that rolltop desk at the museum that matched the body.

  Natalie Teeger : Where's the diamond?

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Still missing in action. Wasn't on him or in the cabin.

  Adrian Monk : We know he had a partner, somebody who works at the museum. It's probably still with him.

  Natalie Teeger : So the reward is still good? I mean, nobody's claimed it?

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Yeah, as far as I know. The reward is still good.

  Natalie Teeger : [holds up file]  Ka-ching!

  Adrian Monk : [to Stottlemeyer]  Could you make her stop saying that?

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : This is no longer a parlor game. A man is dead. This is a homicide investigation, which means *nobody* is to withold *any* information from *anybody*.

  Natalie Teeger : [noticing that Monk and Stottlemeyer are looking at her with accusing looks]  What? Are you looking at me?

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Yes I am, Ms. Teeger.

  Gladys Menchen : [walks into the room to confront Monk about his Post-It notes]  Did you write these? Don't deny it, I know it was you!

  [reads the notes] 

  Gladys Menchen : "How are things down under?" Hint! Hint! "Monk was right. You should clean under the tables." You don't fool me for a second. It goes without saying, "Don't forget to throw away these little Post-Its, too."

  Adrian Monk : [to Stottlemeyer]  Captain, she doesn't clean under the tables.

  Gladys Menchen : You are not the boss of me!

• Landis : [while being questioned about the robbery]  I want to help you guys. I really do, but they've questioned me three times.

  Lt. Randall Disher : It's not just you, Mr. Landis. We're talking to all the guards, cleaning staff, curators, and anybody who was at the museum.

  Landis : Yeah, but I haven't been home yet!

  Lt. Randall Disher : And I appreciate that. We just need your official statement, and you're free to go. So for the record, where were you during the robbery?

  Landis : OK, for the tenth time, I was at my station on the main floor. I *never* left.

  Lt. Randall Disher : And you didn't hear anything unusual?

  Landis : No, sir. I was three floors away.

  Lt. Randall Disher : Okay.

  [noticing Monk and Natalie] 

  Lt. Randall Disher : Excuse me for a second. Can I get you something to drink?

  [Randy walks over to the cooler where Monk and Natalie are standing] 

  Lt. Randall Disher : Monk, Nat.

  Adrian Monk : What's going on?

  Lt. Randall Disher : What? You haven't heard? Robbery at the MacMillan Museum. It was big, big! The Alexander Diamond.

  Natalie Teeger : Whoa!

  Lt. Randall Disher : I know whoa! Robbery division asked us to help out, so we're taking statements from everybody on sight.

  Adrian Monk : So you're not arresting him about the drugs?

  Lt. Randall Disher : Uh, no, what drugs?

  Adrian Monk : His fingertips are stained. It looks like red phosphorus. You get that from making crystal meth. He's got to have a lab somewhere.

  Lt. Randall Disher : Okay, I'll look into it.

  [to Landis] 

  Lt. Randall Disher : Excuse me, Mr. Landis.

  [to Monk and Natalie] 

  Lt. Randall Disher : If the Captain needs me, I'll be in Interrogation Room B.

  [Landis departs with Randy to be interrogated. Monk turns to Natalie, who is dismayed to find that Monk didn't ask for money] 

  Adrian Monk : What?

  Natalie Teeger : You know what? You just solved that case for *free*!

  Lt. Randall Disher : What was I supposed to do? Say, "Lieutenant, there's a drug dealer in the room. I'll tell you who it is for $20."

  Natalie Teeger : At least we'd have $20!

• Adrian Monk : Jewel thieves are like children. They hate to share.

• Adrian Monk : [9:24]  I think you should talk to her.

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : I will. About her aim.