Monk (TV Series)

Mr. Monk Takes a Vacation (2002)

Polly Draper: Rita Bronwyn

Photos 

Quotes 

• Adrian Monk : [Monk has found an Employees Only door]  Who has the key to this door?

  Tony Landis : The entire staff. About 180 people.

  Rita Bronwyn : Are you thinking inside job?

  Adrian Monk : Maybe it's that comedian. Wouldn't that be great?

  [spots powder on the floor] 

  Adrian Monk : Do you have a piece of paper?

  Tony Landis : No.

  Adrian Monk : Isn't that a notepad in your pocket?

  [Tony reluctantly hands his notepad over to Monk. Monk picks up a bit of the powder and sniffs it] 

  Rita Bronwyn : It's lime?

  Adrian Monk : It's calcium oxide-quicklime.

  Tony Landis : What's that supposed to mean?

  Adrian Monk : It's used to cover up smells. Smugglers use it to fool drug-sniffing dogs.

  Rita Bronwyn : Oh! I've seen the mob use it when they try to hide a body.

  Adrian Monk : You've seen the mob use it?

  Rita Bronwyn : I mean, in that movie Goodfellas I saw it.

  Adrian Monk : Actually, this is good news.

  Tony Landis : How so?

  Rita Bronwyn : Because it means the body's still in the hotel, right? So that means we have to keep checking every bag going out.

  Tony Landis : Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You're time is up. We had a deal.

  Rita Bronwyn : Oh, come on. The deal is off, Tony! Work with us here. If they get rid of the body, we have no case.

  Tony Landis : I'll give you until noon tomorrow. You'll be checking out then anyway. Tick! Tick! Tick!

  [leaves] 

  Adrian Monk : God, I hate it when people go, "Tick, tick, tick."

• Rita Bronwyn : [porters are searching peoples' bags]  Oh, nothing. Doors are open. People can come and go as they please.

  Tony Landis : Well, how magnanimous of you.

  Rita Bronwyn : But we still have to search the bags.

  Tony Landis : Why?

  Adrian Monk : He's going to try and dispose of the body.

  Tony Landis : What body?

  Adrian Monk : Mrs. Fenimore.

  Tony Landis : And your theory is based on what?

  Adrian Monk : Benjy witnessed a murder. And I saw Mr. Fenimore flirting with another woman.

  Tony Landis : [scoffs]  Most likely his assistant. Her name is Nicole Young. She comes with Mr. Fenimore and his staff here every year.

  Rita Bronwyn : Look, the point is Mrs. Fenimore is M.I.A. Tony, remember the last Christmas, that jewelry was stolen? You didn't listen to me. I believe you were reprimanded for that.

  Tony Landis : Fine! All right. You have one hour. After that, the siege is over, and we're back to normal.

  Rita Bronwyn : [on her cell phone]  Yeah.

  Tony Landis : ...Or what passes for normal around here. Are you happy now?

  Adrian Monk : I'm never happy. Listen, I might have to stay an extra day or two until we get this sorted out.

  Tony Landis : Oh, impossible. Quite out of the question. We're overbooked as it is.

• [the hotel has been locked down] 

  Tony Landis : Miss Bronwynn, this is not a penitentiary. You have to let these people come and go.

  Rita Bronwyn : I'm gonna let them go, Tony, as soon as we check out Room 401.

  Tony Landis : Do you know who is in Room 401? John Fenimore. The C.O.O. of the third largest brokerage house on the West Coast. He brings his staff here every year for a conference. How do we know the boy just didn't make it up?

  Adrian Monk : Oh, no. He's-he's a good boy. He doesn't lie.

  Tony Landis : All children lie.

  Adrian Monk : Not him. Not to me.

  Tony Landis : Well, of course, you would say that. You're his father.

  Adrian Monk : I'm not his father. His mother works for me.

  Rita Bronwyn : Tony Landis, this is Adrian Monk. Adrian is a former homicide detective. I just talked to his Captain in Frisco. He says we're lucky to have him.

  Tony Landis : Miss Bronwyn, these people are on vacation.

  Rita Bronwyn : Okay, Tony. Tell you what. Why don't you let 'em out and then you can tell the victim's family and the police why you let the murderer go?

  Tony Landis : Fine. Check it out. As discreetly and quickly and discreetly as possible.

  Adrian Monk : You-you said discreetly twice.

  [starts to fix Tony's collar] 

  Tony Landis : Exactly. In fact, I'll say it again. Discreetly.