Married... with Children (TV Series)

The Godfather (1991)

Christina Applegate: Kelly Bundy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Harry Ashland : I'm an alderman.

  Kelly Bundy : That's a priest.

  Harry Ashland : No, actually it's more like a city councilman.

  Kelly Bundy : Well then why did you want me to call you "Father"?

  Harry Ashland : Never mind that now.

• Kelly Bundy : Mom, Dad, I am in love.

  [Al and Peggy shrug] 

  Kelly Bundy : He is the greatest guy that I have ever met.

  Peggy Bundy : Oh, right. That's why you're home at 9:00.

  Kelly Bundy : Well, he likes to get me home because he's a gentleman. And he cares about me because I am a nice girl.

  [Al and Peggy laughs] 

  Al Bundy : Kelly, it's not that we don't believe you, it's just that... we don't believe in love.

  Peggy Bundy : That's why our marriage works.

• Peggy Bundy : [to Kelly]  Oh, but, honey, maybe love will work for you.

  [Al and Peggy snickers] 

  Peggy Bundy : Go ahead, tell us all about him.

  Kelly Bundy : Well, there isn't really much to tell.

  [Bud comes downstairs] 

  Bud Bundy : A-A-A-Ahem, a-a-ahem, a-a-ahem. Once again, my dear sister is prone to understatement. But if you want this reporter's opinion, I shall now open the bidding at, uh, $10.

  Kelly Bundy : Shut up, Bud. He's not that old.

  [Al and Peggy both give Bud $10] 

  Peggy Bundy : Okay, spill your guts.

  Bud Bundy : He's 41.

  [Al and Peggy stare at Kelly] 

  Peggy Bundy : You are dating a man old enough to be my father?

  Al Bundy : Peg, she's not dating Lincoln.

• [Kelly comes home with an unintelligent-looking guy] 

  Kelly Bundy : Guess what, everybody. I am on the front page of the newspaper. How great is that?

  Al Bundy : [still looking at his newspaper]  There are no words.

  Kelly Bundy : Well, you could have thrown me for a Fruit Loop when I heard he was married, but I guess the signs were there if you just know how to recognize them. The wedding ring, the diapers in the backseat of the station wagon. The late-night calls from that crazy woman going, "Stay away from my husband, you homewrecking little tramp." Oh, well. Case of rum, case of rum, that's what I always say. But you'll be glad to know that this time, I am truly in love. I want you to meet my new friend, Salt Water. Show Daddy what you can do.

  [Salt Water combs through his hair, picks out something, then eats it] 

  Salt Water : Can I call you "Dad"?

  Kelly Bundy : Isn't he great? And don't worry, Daddy. This one is single.