Hogan's Heroes (TV Series)
The Empty Parachute (1969)
Bob Crane: Col. Hogan
Quotes
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Sgt. Andrew Carter : I hate to say this, Colonel, but I don't see any way we're going to get our hands on that briefcase.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : You're right, the situation is hopeless, there's no solution, we're faced with an absolute impossibility.
Cpl. Peter Newkirk : In that case, sir, why don't you tell us what you've thought of?
Col. Robert E. Hogan : Alright, here it is.
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Col. Robert E. Hogan : [talking to Schultz] That's why they made you sergeant after only 12 years in the army.
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Cpl. Peter Newkirk : I think Kommandant Klink's looking for you.
Sgt. Schultz : He knows where I am. I'm right here if he wants me.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : What makes you think he wants to see Schultz?
Cpl. Peter Newkirk : Oh, I heard him say, "Where is that idiot?" No, he said, "Where is that stupid idiot?"
Sgt. Andrew Carter : Maybe he meant someone else.
Sgt. Schultz : No, he wants me.
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Col. Klink : Today, when your men went into town on a work detail, the did something which I consider a personal insult.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : What did they do?
Col. Klink : They were wearing arm bands that said that they were prisoners here at Stalag 13. They went into a tourist agency and asked for travel folders.
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Major Blair : There are two models. One, you turn the handle clockwise, and the other, you turn it counter clockwise.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : Which one's this?
Major Blair : There's no way of telling. Take your choice. But not to worry, if you made a mistake, you'll never know it.
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Col. Robert E. Hogan : Tell me how to open it.
Major Blair : Okay, but if I hear a loud noise, I won't bother going on.